


Another Sin

by thecrescendo



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Cashton, Clemmings, Explicit Sexual Content, Love/Hate, M/M, Muke - Freeform, Mutual Pining, Stripper!Ashton, Stripper!Michael, stripper!calum
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-29
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-03-09 14:35:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 42,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3253364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecrescendo/pseuds/thecrescendo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Because of Ben and Jack's stupid idea of a celebration, Luke meets the boy that shifts his perspective in the right direction. Also, Calum can't take the idea of a competition.</p><p>Or Calum, Michael and Ashton are strippers, Luke can't help but keep coming back, and Calum and Ashton can't stop arguing</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. eyes like a shot of whiskey

**Author's Note:**

> I've been thinking about this plot for a long time and I finally put it into action. Also, I needed stripper!michael in my life.

_Fuck, I’m twenty_

Luke rolled out of his bed with that thought in mind. As soon as he woke up, his mood was sour and he’s irritable. He was supposed to be ecstatic and bubbly, it was his birthday for crying out loud. Although after 20 years of living, he soon found out birthdays were only celebrated when you’re young.

Bitter was a finer way to describe him at that moment.

It was one of  _those_  mornings.

*

“Brother!” Jack shouted from the other line when Luke answered his phone. Luke found his brother’s antics annoying but kept calm, he didn’t want to snap at him. “I am calling in to greet you a happy birthday!”

Luke fought the urge to shake his head at Jack’s ridiculousness even though he knew no one could see him. “Is that all?” he asked, tone uninterested. Luke tried to sound as patient as he can; he was never a morning person. His brother knew that, Jack would understand.

“Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.”

“Jack, get to it.”

There was a long pause on the other line. Luke thought Jack had hung up but then he spoke again. “Ben and I are taking you out tonight. We’re going to celebrate the fact that you’re no longer a teen,” Jack explained, his voice buzzing with excitement.

“What if I have plans?” Admittedly, Luke didn’t have any plans for his birthday but his brother didn’t need to know that.

“Are there really more important people in your life other than your brothers?” Jack asked, feigning hurt. “What would mum say about that?” Of course Jack would drag their mother into this.

There was no way out.

“Do I have a say in this?”

“Nope.”

*

Jack arrived at Luke’s flat a few hours after the call. When Luke asked where their plans would take them, Jack wouldn’t open up. ‘It’s a surprise’ was Jack’s lame attempt at an explanation. As much as he wanted to, Luke knew arguing would be pointless so he let his brothers have their way.

“Don’t I at least deserve to know where we’re going?” Luke asked, hesitating to finish getting ready, taking miniscule steps to his closet.

Jack had the audacity to laugh as if something was funny. There wasn’t. “Wouldn’t that ruin the surprise?” he teased, leaning his shoulder on the doorframe. Jack crossed his arms as he eyed his brother, a silent command for him to move faster. “We don’t have all night, Lukey.”

“Stop calling me Lukey,” Luke said, disappearing into his closet only to emerge with a different set of clothes. “How do I even know how to dress when I have no idea where we’re going?”

“Anything you wear would be fine. No one will pay attention to clothes there,” Jack responded, laughing lightly like he said something funny. Luke felt uneasy as he shifted on his feet. Seeming to read Luke’s mind, Jack added, “We won’t let anything bad happen to you. If you seriously don’t feel like it, we’ll leave immediately, okay?”

Reluctantly, Luke nodded and wore his jacket. “I just, I don’t see why you’re so insistent on taking me somewhere when I’m fine with just eating out -”

Jack broke him off with a loud laugh. “Oh grow up,” Luke said, hitting Jack’s shoulder as he walked past him out the door.

It took a few minutes for Ben to arrive, music blaring through the speakers as his car slowed to a stop in front of Jack and Luke. “Brothers!” Ben exclaimed when the passenger side window rolled down, looking a little too happy. Ben turned to Luke, “Ready, bro?”

With a shrug, Luke walked to open the back seat when Jack pulled him back. “Shotgun,” Jack said, pointing to the passenger side of Ben’s car. Without another beat, he climbed into the car.

After closing his door, he looked over to Ben, who was grinning, and then to Jack who was getting settled in the back seat. “I’m going to regret this so much, am I?” Luke mumbled, mostly to himself as he pulled his seatbelt securely. “A deal’s a deal, we leave if I want to, okay?” he added, looking sternly at Jack through the rear view mirror. With a snicker, Jack nodded and Ben started pulling away from the driveway.

The car ride was incredibly silent. Ben and Jack were being secretive and Luke didn’t bother trying to start up conversation. Luckily, Luke felt comfortable enough with the stretching silence inside the car. Jack, however, had other plans as he kept laughing to himself in the backseat.

“I gotta say I’m still thankful you didn’t go to the extent of putting a blindfold on me,” Luke said, filling the silence. He just felt like he had to say something and that was the first thing to come up.

Just like the past few minutes, the only thing Jack did was laugh. “Anything funny?” Luke asked, turning back to look at his brother.

Jack had to cover his mouth to keep from laughing. With a shake of his head, he composed himself and answered Luke. “I mean, that could be done later, if you want. Right, Ben?” Jack responded, an inside joke between him and Ben once again. Soon enough both of his older brothers were laughing, keeping him out of the joke.

“Dicks,” Luke said, rolling his eyes as he kept his focus on the houses they’re driving past. He leaned his head on the window as the laughter around him died down.

They stopped at a red light when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Ben smiling at him. “You’ll have fun, I promise. I’ll even let you take a swing at me if you hate it,” Ben said with a wink.

“No thanks,” he responded, smiling at his brother for the first time that night. “The world isn’t ready to see you get beat up by your younger brother,” he added and soon the three brothers were laughing.

After a few more minutes of driving, Luke grew impatient. “Are we even close to it yet?” he asked, sitting upright and looking at their surroundings. “We’ve been in this car for too long. I’m going to start smelling like Ben.”

“Good, maybe now you’ll smell decent.”

“Shut up, Ben.”

Before Ben could argue, Jack spoke up. “Strip club.” 

“What?” Luke asked, his head turning to Jack as fast as possible.

Smiling smugly, Jack nodded. “We know.” 

The feeling of confusion and annoyance merged and Luke continued to stare at his brother. As if on cue to break the impending tension, Ben spoke up. “We’re here,” he said, parking the car and he was the first one out.

“You didn’t answer my question,” Luke said, crossing his arms in front of his chest, refusing to go down the vehicle.

“We know,” Jack repeated as he stood by Luke’s window, cocking his head as a sign for Luke to get out of the car.

With a quirked brow, Luke turned to face his brother. An unspoken question transpired between them. “Get out and you’ll understand what I’m talking about,” was Jack’s departing sentence before walking to catch up with Ben.

*

Jack wasn’t lying; they definitely were at a strip club. Pictures of women were plastered on the walls and the club was almost covered in neon. Tacky but he’ll take it. Luke looked up at the sign.

_Temptation_. 

“Well that just sounds stupid,” Luke said, calling out to his brothers. “Couldn’t they have chosen a better name?” he asked, finally at the same pace with his brothers.

Looking around, Luke took in the rest of the area. Men and women were by the entrance and they all appeared to be customers. “Women like watching women too?” he whispered, leaning towards Jack, who laughed lightly.

“I guess,” Jack replied, a grin never leaving his lips. “Again, Luke, we know,” Jack added then he turned to Luke as soon as they reached the end of the line. 

Before Luke could ask once more, a group of men walked past the line and people started howling and cheering. There were too many people in the group for them to just be bartenders and bouncers. Also, customers won’t react that way if they were. Everything was so unclear to Luke.

“Employees,” Ben whispered as if feeling Luke’s confusion.

Luke tried forming his question multiple times but none of which sound intelligible. “Men?” was all he could utter. Both his brothers were nodding and smiling at him. 

He shook his head and looked at his brothers with wide eyes. It finally dawned on him. “Since when?” With a defeated sigh, he added, “and how?”

“Lukey boy,” Ben said, placing a hand on Luke’s shoulder. Luke cringed at the nickname and he shrugged his brother’s hand off. “Now is not the time for explanation… but  _exploration_ ,” Ben continued, his tone indicating he was proud of his statement. Luke thought otherwise.

Knowing he can’t trust his brothers with proper explanations at the time being, he kept quiet. He was also slightly hoping the night would end soon.

*

As they neared the door, Luke could already hear the bass pounding inside the club. He tried his best to tune it out and keep himself from getting a headache.

Soon enough they were inside. The music was clearer and louder and Luke’s head was thumping to the beat of the bass. “Loud,” he told Ben, who was already focused on something else.

With a sigh, Luke started to walk through the small space and look around. Without the horrible music, the place would’ve been decent. The bar was equipped with various chairs and the bottles displayed were of high quality. The stage was well lit and colorful, perfect for capturing attention. The chairs look comfortable enough and sturdy. Luke was paying attention to too many things that didn’t matter. 

He was so focused on the overwhelming feeling of being inside a  _mixed_  strip club that Luke didn’t notice a show was starting on the right side of the club.

“-on the stage!” the voice through the speaker announced when Luke finally started to listen. The curtain was rising and Luke already devoted his full attention on the stage. Judging by the shoes, he figured out it was the men who were starting the show.

Immediately catching his eye was the boy by the back of the group. Tall and pale skinned with faded purple hair. Despite the spotlight and other lights directed at the stage, Luke couldn’t help but notice the boy’s eyes. He was close enough to gaze at it. The boy’s eyes were appealing and lustrous despite Luke not being able to see what color it was, even the eyeliner under his eyes suited him.

The boy onstage was captivating and alluring with his pretty legs and fluid hip movements. He danced gracefully while slowly removing pieces of clothing. The smirk grazing his features simply added to his charm.

Staring wasn’t enough to describe what Luke was doing. He wasn’t just watching. He was trying to imprint the boy’s movements in his mind. Even with numerous other males on stage, Luke was fixated on the boy.

“Lukey, you’re drooling.” Jack’s voice was suddenly within earshot, Luke not noticing his brother coming closer. “I see you got your eye on someone,” Jack added, his thumb jerking to the purple-haired boy’s direction.

Luke was quick to shake his head. “They’re performing, I’m supposed to watch, right?” Luke defended, stealing a glance at the boy before completely turning to face his brother.

“Really?” Jack’s eyes were filled with mischief. “Describe two of them then,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

Pursing his lips, Luke thought for a moment. “There’s someone with purple hair,” Luke said, might as well mention the only one he noticed. “And another one has tattoos on his arm. Like those armband things, yeah.” That was the only other description he remembered seeing on stage.

Both statements described the same boy.

Jack was grinning while he nodded. “Alright,” he said, tapping his chin lightly. “I’ll be right back.” Luke watched as Jack walked up to Ben to whisper something. Ben seemed to like what Jack said and gave him a high-five. Luke shook his head and looked away.

Once again, Luke was left alone. When he looked back at the stage, his eyes automatically searched for  _his_  boy. While he was watching him, their eyes locked for a few seconds. There was that captivating smirk once again.

“It’s from the adrenaline of performing,” the rational part of him reasoned.

The other part, however, was downright swooning. He takes back what he said earlier, the night should last forever.

The boy made Luke feel undeniably intoxicated.


	2. you and i might just be the best thing

The most reiterated reminder they have to hear was _make the audience feel as if you’re only doing this for them_.

This has never been a difficult task for Michael. He can captivate a crowd as soon as he gets on stage. Even when he was just starting he already had people at his mercy. He was that much of a natural.

He expected the show that night to be just the same as any other night. He’ll get onstage, pump up the crowd, and proceed to doing what he does best.

Although when he spotted the tall blond boy in the mass of people, the easiest task he had mastered seemed to be the hardest. Michael wanted to capture his attention and only his.

While he was onstage, he couldn’t help but feel inadequate. All his best moves were thrown into the moment. His hips were more fluid in motion. He took his clothes off agonizingly slow just to keep everyone on the edge.

Success pulsated through his body as soon as he looked back at the blond. Amongst all the eyes that were on him, he only cared for that specific pair. Smirking to himself, he continued working as he stole a few glances here and there before their segment was over.

*

“Clifford, you’re requested,” Maya, their so-called handler, told him as soon as he got off the stage.

Most of the time, Michael was reluctant and if-y when it came to private sessions. He’d often provide excuses but they barely work. Unfortunately for him, Maya knew him too well to get caught up with his reasoning.

“I get tired too, you know. In case you forgot, I’m still human.”

“With those hips, Mike, you’re definitely not human,” Calum said with a light pat on Michael’s hips. “They’re out of this world.”

Michael moved Calum’s hand away and chuckled. “You’re the one to talk ‘Mr. Everyone Wants A Piece of Me’,” he replied, pinching Calum’s bum softly.

It was an accurate statement. Calum was always the main attraction, even when he was still a bit lanky and uncoordinated. Men and women fall to their knees whenever Calum was onstage. Out of everyone, Calum was by far the most requested. The dark haired boy even has the choice to actually deny a request.

Maya broke their conversation by pulling Michael away, gaining his attention back. “You’re requested. Go and prepare,” she repeated.

Pursing his lips with a nod, he wanted to prolong the situation both for his enjoyment and Maya’s displeasure. “Mind describing her?” he asked. While he worked in a mixed club, most of his requests came from women. Not that he was complaining.

“Him, actually,” Maya corrected with a nod. Michael couldn’t help but smile at the change of pace. “Extremely tall, broad shoulders, blond hair, was with two other guys,” she said, gestures trying to match her description. “Particularly easy to spot, to be honest.”

“Yeah, I think I saw him,” he said, running his fingers through his damp hair. There was idle silence between them since neither knew who had to say something next.

When Maya raised her brows at him, he knew he needed to get moving. He raised his hands in defense. “m going, ‘m going, jeez,” he said, walking away to the showers.

*

As soon as the purple-haired boy got off the stage, no one else ticked Luke’s attention. He sat alone in the bar while his brothers were off doing something that didn’t include him, again.

“-think he’ll like it?” Luke heard Ben’s voice behind him, relieved that his brothers finally returned.

Jack stood in front of Luke and took his drink away. When Luke protested, Ben’s hands were on his shoulders, pulling him back. “No, no, dear brother,” Ben teased, patting him lightly. “We want you sober for this one.”

“What did you get me into?” Luke asked, eyes growing as his hand reached for his drink.

Jack downed Luke’s drink and smiled at him. “A special lap dance, brother,” Ben answered, his tone laced with amusement. “Stand up,” he added, pulling Luke to his feet before a voice addressed the three of them.

“Birthday boy?” a girl asked, approaching the brothers. Ben and Jack looked at each other with triumphant smiles before turning to Luke. With a quirk of Ben’s eyebrow, they pushed Luke forward, almost stumbling.

Luke looked down and eyed the girl, his gaze was full of questions but he kept quiet. “He the lucky one tonight?” she asked and both his older brothers nodded. “Follow me,” she instructed before leading the way. Ben and Jack were still smiling when Luke turned to look at them. He flipped them off while they were waving enthusiastically.

Halfway through the corridor, Luke broke the silence. “S-so… are you-”

“Oh darling, I wish,” she said, patting Luke’s cheek. “Someone else has you tonight.” She pointed to the door in front of them while her other hand was pushing on the small of his back. “Have fun.”

Luke was stuck in place as he watched the girl’s retreating frame. He looked back at the door before reaching for the knob. In other instances he’d be as confident as ever but this time it was unexplored territory. He had no clue how to interact with a stripper.

After opening the door, he slowly walked inside. The lights were dim and there was a chair by the middle of the room. Taking a few steps inside, he felt someone else’s presence behind him. The door closed with a soft click.

“I saw you staring,” the person said, stepping forward to reveal his identity. When Luke’s eyes grew wide in realization, Michael was amused. “Your brothers are smart,” he commented, walking towards Luke. “Or you’re just that obvious.”

Luke took a step back and shook his head while crossing his arms defensively. “Watching,” he corrected, “not staring. You’re onstage, what was I supposed to do?”

“Look at the others,” Michael said then he smirked. “I gotta say it’s an achievement to outshine our star performer.” Michael nodded as he stepped even closer to Luke.

When he was close enough, he placed one hand on the crook of Luke’s neck. Luke tried to pull away so Michael placed both of his hands on Luke’s shoulders and pushed him to the chair. “Princess, this is a lap dance. At least act like you want it.”

Luke audibly gulped as he got settled on the chair. He continued to find a comfortable position, trying to figure out if he should lean back or only sit halfway on the chair. Michael must’ve sensed this since he walked behind Luke, placing his hands gently on his shoulders to pull him back.

“You seem a bit too tense, love,” Michael said, leaning closer to Luke’s ear. “We should work on that.”

Small and soft hands started to massage Luke, gently releasing all the tension built in Luke’s shoulders and creating a different kind. Luke couldn’t help but lean further into Michael’s touch, even to the point of failing to suppress a moan he couldn’t help but release.

“We haven’t even started yet,” Michael whispered as his hands ceased their movements. Michael’s hands slowly traveled down Luke’s torso, his nose slightly grazing Luke’s jawline. “What do you want me to do?” he asked, his hands going back up, applying more pressure from the tips of his fingers.

Luke took a deep breath then bit the inside of his cheeks. His mind was too clouded that he couldn’t form proper words. “Anything,” he breathed out, not recognizing his own voice.

“You’re too special for just anything, princess,” Michael said, followed by a chuckle. Luke could feel Michael’s warm breath on his ear.

“You probably say that to everyone.”

Michael shook his head, leaving a soft kiss on Luke’s neck. “Be vocal, I wanna hear what you want.” Michael stepped back and Luke silently whimpered at the loss of his warmth. Michael then stood in front of him, leaning forward and steadying himself by placing his hands on Luke’s thighs.

“Just,” Luke started, looking down at Michael’s hands. “Do what you normally do.” He looked up and he was met with Michael’s face only a few centimeters away.

Michael started caressing Luke’s thighs with his thumbs while his green eyes were still locked with Luke’s blue ones. “Don’t let me repeat it again,” Michael said, tilting his head so he was by Luke’s ear once more. “You’re too special for mediocre treatment,” he whispered before gently nibbling Luke’s ear.

“Sit on my lap,” Luke demanded. His hands were on Michael’s hips, pulling him closer. Michael obliged and was situated on Luke’s lap, grinding slowly closer to Luke’s crotch.

“That’s it, tell me what you want.”

Michael’s hands were playing with the hem of Luke’s shirt while Luke’s hands were already pushing Michael’s shirt upward. “Shirt, off.”

Michael stood up and grinned as he reached behind him to pull his shirt up. He placed the discarded shirt on Luke’s lap then walked behind the chair again. “I got told you wanted to be blindfolded?”

Before Luke could react, his vision was already blocked. Michael tied a handkerchief around his head, securing it with a double knot. “Trust me, this will be fun,” Michael said, leaving a kiss on Luke’s cheek.

“Are you allowed to do that?”

“I’m allowed to do anything you want to happen and what you’re comfortable with,” Michael replied, taking Luke’s hand to pull him up. “Your wish is my command.”

With a click of a button, soft music started playing in the room and Michael started to sway his hips with one of Luke’s hands still in his own. Michael turned around so his back was flush against Luke’s chest. Luke’s hands immediately went to Michael’s hips, guiding the older boy’s body to move with his own. Michael reached behind him and ran his fingers through Luke’s already disheveled hair. The chemistry in their movements was undeniable and Michael seemed to figure out Luke’s pleasure points immediately.

“I won’t know how to please you if you’re silent,” Michael urged, wanting to know exactly what Luke wanted. He felt Luke’s lips on his shoulder and he smiled to himself before pushing back, knowing how it was affecting Luke. Michael’s body slowly slid down, back still pressed firmly against the taller boy.

Quietly, Michael stepped away from Luke to get something he left by the door. “Where are you?” Luke asked, taking a few steps forward with his hands reaching out.

Michael took hold of one of Luke’s wrists and put something around it. Luke heard a click and pulled his hand back. Before Luke could ask, Michael was already pulling Luke back to the chair. “Thought we could make it more interesting,” Michael said, shaking the handcuffs for it to make a faint sound.

Once Luke was situated on the chair again, Michael pulled both Luke’s hands behind him and handcuffed it together. “Is it too tight?” Michael asked and Luke shook his head.

“Can you take off the blindfold? I wanna see you.”

“Yeah,” Michael said, standing up to untie the handkerchief.

Luke blinked a few times and he realized the room got brighter. “So the room -”

“We can dim them again, if you want.”

“No, no, my eyes were just surprised, I guess.”

“Well that is definitely killing the mood,” Michael joked as he settled on Luke’s lap again. “Like being tied up?” he asked, fingers trailing on Luke’s arms.

Luke shrugged, followed by light laughter. “It has its perks,” he said, locking eyes with Michael.

Luke leaned forward but Michael pulled away, dodging Luke’s head. “Sorry, I just -”

Michael shook his head, reaching up to caress Luke’s cheek. “I had to have some boundaries left, right?” Michael said and his tone was calm, which was a good sign for Luke.

Luke’s eyebrows furrowed as he tried to locate an answer in Michael’s features. “You do all this but kiss on the lips? That doesn’t make sense.” Luke tried to find a proper way to phrase his query but it all sounded too harsh in his mind. Fortunately, Michael didn’t seem to take offense from it.

“Kisses are intimate, princess,” he started, wrapping his arms around Luke’s neck. “You see, it’s too personal,” he added, resting his head on Luke’s shoulders.

“Did you just reference ‘Pretty Woman’?”

“I see you’re cultured, then,” Michael joked, tilting his head so his nose was pushed against Luke’s neck. “I am quite serious, though.”

Luke nodded, wanting to wrap his arms around Michael then he remembered that his hands were still cuffed. “This could’ve been cuter if my hands were free,” Luke said as he shook his hands, the handcuffs’ chain making a sound.

“What makes you think I want cute? I’m here for kinky.”

Luke nervously laughed when he couldn’t think of anything to reply with.

And just as Michael timed it, a faint ringing sound came from his pocket. “Too bad your time is up, princess, I guess we’ll never see how kinky you can actually get,” Michael added, unwrapping himself from Luke to take the handcuffs off. He turned the alarm off as Luke took his time to stand up.

“Thanks,” Luke said, picking up Michael’s shirt and handing it back to him.

“It was all my pleasure, princess.”

“Luke.”

“Huh?”

“My name. It’s Luke.”

Michael nodded, contemplating whether or not he should respond with his own name. They’ve always been cautious about their names, it’s one thing left they can conceal. “Call me Mike.”

“So that’s not your real name,” Luke asked with an eyebrow raised.

“What makes you think that?”

“You know, the stripper movie?”

“Oh right, right, that movie exists,” Michael said with a nod. “I guess you’d just have to find out.”

Luke gave Michael a smile before walking towards the door. “Hey Luke,” Michael called out, making Luke turn back to him.

“Happy Birthday.”


	3. getting sick of your bullshit attitude

Admittedly, it was cliché and cheesy and pathetic but Luke couldn’t help but touch the part of his neck Michael was just nuzzled into. The last few minutes he had spent with Michael felt natural. Tattooed arms wrapped around his neck, Michael’s warm breath against his skin, bright red lips ghosting just beside his Adam’s apple. It felt nice. It felt genuine.

It felt _right_.

He smiled to himself though the practical part of his brain was already catching up to him.

Michael’s a stripper. Michael entertains clients for a living. What just happened between them was nothing to the other boy. It’s his job to make Luke feel what he was feeling. The whispers, the light kisses, the soft touches, the pet names. It was all part of Michael’s act. The bliss Luke felt and how content he’s feeling was planned.

It was all fabricated.

Slowly, Luke’s smile dropped.

He finally reached where his brothers were seated by the bar and were probably on their nth bottle by now.

“We should get going,” Luke said, deflated and passive. He didn’t mean for it to sound the way he said it. He wanted to sound at least a bit grateful for his brothers’ efforts and how thoughtful they were to have thought of bringing him somewhere.

“I have to work tomorrow,” he added so to not sound like he badly wanted to leave. But he did. He wanted to leave and probably forget the damn night.

“But,” Jack whined, taking the final gulp from his current bottle. “The party’s just getting started, Lukey.”

Luke sighed, taking a seat next to Ben. “You said we’d leave if I wanted to. Now I do, so please, let’s go,” Luke reasoned as he snatched Ben’s bottle and keeping it away from him.

“You aren’t even drunk yet,” Ben said, slinging an arm around Luke’s shoulders. “Now that you’ve had your lap dance, you should get wasted.”

Luke noticed Ben trying to reach for the bottle and the younger boy tried to extend his arm further away. His efforts were useless, Ben was still able to retrieve the bottle from Luke’s grip.

“Don’t be such a buzz kill. I’m already getting sober from your whining,” Jack teased, massaging his temples gently. “At least finish a bottle. You aren’t that much of a lightweight, I’ll give you that.”

“One bottle and we leave, deal?”

When his brothers simultaneously nodded, he looked up at the bartender and got his bottle. He took a swig before turning back to his brothers. “I don’t understand why you chose beer when you’re surrounded by better alcohol.”

“Neither do we,” Ben slurred followed by a shrug.

Because of his brothers’ drunken demeanor, Luke finished his bottle quickly and stood up. He grabbed Ben and Jack’s wrists and pulled them to the nearest exit.

“As much as it’s amusing to watch you both get drunk off your minds, I _really_ wanna leave,” Luke said as he stopped beside Ben’s car. He didn’t bother covering up his tone; neither brother was taking tabs on what he’s feeling anyway. He steadied Ben by propping him against the car while he searched for his keys.

“Dammit Luke, you’re no fun.” It didn’t matter which brother said it, Luke wasn’t going to change his mind. “If you wanna leave then leave, but can’t you let us stay here?”

It was amusing how he seems like the older brother in this situation. Jack was half-sitting on the car’s hood with his head slightly bopping to the muffled beat from the club. He was also staring at his own shoes as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. Ben was still against the car, his eyes searching the parking lot, still full of the buzz from his last bottle. If they were in a different time and place, he probably would use this against them. Too bad his mood shifted for the worst.

As soon as Luke got the keys, he unlocked the doors and helped his brothers get in the back seat. Backing away from the parking lot, all Luke could hum was the soft song playing as Michael danced for him. He’s dubbed it as _their_ song.

He absolutely hated it.

While he drove, he kept looking back at his brothers from the rear view mirror, checking up on them to see if they were holding up. He noticed Jack slightly shiver.

“Hey Jack, you okay?” he asked, turning back as soon as he hit a red light.

“Chilly,” was all he muttered as a reply.

Luke was about to grab his jacket when he remembered where he left it.

“Shit.”

*

Michael arrived early for work the next day. The club was almost empty except for the bartender who was fixing up the bottles on the shelves and the maintenance who was cleaning some of the tables.

“’ey Mikey! You’re here early,” Gene, the owner of the club, said as he entered a few minutes after Michael. “What’re you excited for work today?”

“Nothing,” Michael defended as Gene walked to the backroom, Michael following suit. “Maybe I just love working, can’t that ever be a possibility?” he added, raising his brows in a challenging manner.

Gene shook his head while flipping through the pages of his logbook. “We’ve been friends far too long for me to believe that, mate,” he said, stopping on a page and reading what’s written before looking back at Michael. “Maybe you heard the rumors and can’t wait to grill the newbie?”

Michael hasn’t heard any rumors. If there’s a rumor to start with, Calum would’ve told him as soon as possible. On a positive note, the thought of having a newbie has him excited.

“Hmm, new meat. We haven’t had one in a while, could be interesting.”

Michael was then left alone when Gene said something about filling the alcohol stock. He didn’t bother offering to help; he had his own plans while he was alone.

After being certain that he was alone, he walked over to Maya’s table. He knows there was a particular folder she kept clients names in. Michael was thankful their handler had her list and that she has a weird fixation on knowing names. The night before was a particularly slow one and if he’s lucky, there’d only be one Luke in the list.

Too consumed on looking through the list, Michael missed Calum walking into the room. Smiling to himself, Calum figured out what the other boy was up to. He walked back outside and decided to come back after a few minutes.

When Michael got to the end of the list, he put the folder back where he found it with a scowl. There wasn’t even one Luke on the list. Then he remembered it was his brothers who requested him. Trying to mask his disappointment, he flopped on the couch as he waited for the other performers to arrive.

A few hours after, the room finally got filled with the other performers that night. Calum was the first to arrive, pretending he wasn’t in the club a few minutes before.

It was a typical night. Everyone was moving around to put on their outfits and remembering their cues. Different remixes filled the room and if Michael’s attention wasn’t on deciding his clothes for the night, he would’ve developed a headache. How he can put up with this type of music should merit him an award.

Michael and Calum were in deep conversation when someone unfamiliar walked into the room. Both boys looked at the stranger. He was wearing a tank top filled with holes, ripped black skinny jeans, and a beanie where a few strands of his curly hair were left astray under it.

 _Curls_ , they chose the nickname silently.

Looking at him, he held an undeniable fascination. The boy looked strong with his large hands and equally large biceps yet looking at just his face makes him look like the least intimidating person in the world. The smile he held was contagious and enough to light up the room. There was an energy inside him that wasn’t hard to spot. He seeps of positivity, looking at him already proves as much. With the way he held himself, he might be new to the club but he definitely wasn’t new to the scene. Judging by the looks of it, he’d been working for years.

While Michael and Calum continued to assess the stranger, Curls turned to face the pair. He greeted them with a smile as he walked towards the couch they were sitting on.

“You must be the newbie,” Michael said when he stood up, Calum beside him with a puzzled expression. “’m Michael.”

“Yep,” Curls responded, extending his hand out. “’m Ashton.”

Michael shook Ashton’s hand before Ashton turned to Calum. “Gonna introduce yourself, gorgeous?” he asked, giving Calum a smug smile. “Or do I have to think of my own way of calling you?”

 _Strike one_ , Calum thought.

As Calum was about to retort, Gene called out. “Irwin, I need to prep you,” he said from the other side of the room, gaining chuckles from everyone inside.

“Who gave you the idea I bottom?” Ashton said, fueling the joke. Before leaving, he made sure to wink at Calum.

“Dude’s a prick, I hate him already,” Calum said as soon as Ashton was out of earshot.

“Bro, you talk just like him. I think you’ll get along well,” Michael said, patting Calum’s shoulder before he walked to his locker.

“We seriously don’t need another asshole here,” Calum said, walking towards the clothes rack to grab his clothes. “You’re already too much.”

“I’m taking that as a compliment.”

While they were changing, Calum couldn’t help but continue ranting about Ashton. “Did you see the way he looked at me? Anyone would be offended!”

Michael’s thoughts were completely occupied by a different blond, but being the good friend that he was, he still acknowledged Calum. “He called you gorgeous, that must be something.”

“Yeah, in a condescending way. He’s too fucking full of himself, man,” Calum said, his costume finally on properly.

“You’ve only met the guy.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that he’s an ass.”

“But you like ass.”

That earned Michael a smack behind his head. “Keep that up and I’m telling Maya you want to stalk one of your customers from last night,” Calum said with a raised brow. “Yeah, I saw you looking through her list a while ago.”

“You’ve resorted to being a tattletale, I see. What is this, year three?”

Calum brushed the comment off but continued to pry. “I bet I know who it is.”

“I bet I don’t care.”

“Blond,” Calum started, then he grinned when Michael stared at him wide-eyed. “You’ve always preferred blonds, this isn’t a surprise. He’s really tall too, taller than you. Who knew that was possible?”

Michael’s jaw slightly dropped. “You couldn’t possibly know who he is,” Michael said, walking past Calum to walk to the mirror and apply eyeliner.

“But I do.”

“Shut up.”

“You’ve been thinking about him, haven’t you?”

“Again, shut up.”

Of course, Calum doesn’t shut up. He was enjoying seeing Michael squirm. Michael had always been detached and he hasn’t paid any attention into anyone he’s recently met. If Michael is looking through folders and lists, it’s easy to say he’s hooked.

“What’s gotten you so whipped?”

Michael was hesitant. He wasn’t sure if he should tell Calum about it. This was unprofessional on their part, talking about customers and dare say, taking interest in them. Come to think of it, if he were to tell anyone, it would be Calum. The other boy has been beside Michael’s side for who knows how long.

“He tried to kiss me.”

Calum pieced it together quickly. He knew about Michael’s ‘no kiss on the lips’ policy. He understood Michael, he doesn’t let anybody just kiss him as well but Calum had kissed some customers before. Michael was stubborn and he held onto that rule he had set for himself.

“You wanted to kiss him,” he said, a soft look in his eyes.

Michael’s silence was enough to confirm that Calum was right.

Calum was considerate enough to leave Michael alone after that conversation. He needed to wrap his head around the dilemma. The purple-haired boy was too distracted by his thoughts that he forgot his cue. Maya had to snap him out of it and pull him by the stage.

“I don’t know what’s happening, Michael, but get your shit together,” Maya whispered before walking away from him.

He motioned to the DJ to repeat his remix. He shook his head and appeared before the crowd right on his cue. Looking through the audience, his expression fell. Michael didn’t know what he was thinking when he got onstage. Of course Luke wouldn’t be there, watching him. He should’ve known he wasn’t going to see the tall, broad, blond boy with pretty blue eyes staring at him while he grazed the stage.

When his set was finished, he knew his performance wasn’t his best. He kept forgetting the steps he rehearsed earlier and he wasn’t in time with the beat. He almost tripped and got caught up with the smoke. The audience barely reacted and his usuals didn’t seem to enjoy themselves.

His thoughts were too absorbed with Luke.

While he mentally beat himself up, he left the stage with a huff. The first thing he heard when he returned to the backroom was Calum.

“Well aren’t you such a fucking expert. What are you doing wasting your time in this shit club?” Calum exclaimed. Whoever he was talking to clearly got to him since Calum barely raised his voice at anyone.

Other performers were looking at Calum. A few steps to the right and Michael would be able to see who Calum was arguing with but he didn’t need to, he heard Ashton’s voice a few seconds later.

“Calm down, mate, all I said was that your costume doesn’t really match your music. I was just trying to help out.”

Michael stood by the clothes rack, watching the scene just like everyone else in the backroom.

“Maybe you want to take over my set as well, huh? You appear to know what I’m planning to do,” Calum reasoned, his hands balling into fists already. “You should just make this your whole show. Everyone else be some back-up to your greatness.”

Ashton laughed, amused and annoyance mixing together. “I didn’t know you couldn’t take criticism. I get that now, I’ll let you be.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Whatever you want it to be, sweetheart.”

The pet name added to Calum’s rage. “I was right, you are too fucking full of yourself. I can’t believe Gene hired you. I thought the man would pick up your shit attitude as soon as he met you.”

“Isn’t that a requirement in this industry? I heard you’re quite full of yourself too.”

“Fuck. You.”

Calum was never one to be violent and Michael knew that. He also knew that Calum stepping closer to Ashton wouldn’t pose a threat but he felt the need to intervene.

“What is with all the shouting?”

Both males turned to Michael. Calum’s face softened and Ashton’s face turned thankful. Michael’s sudden grip on things was unexpected but he was glad it was there. He needed to focus on something other than someone he knows he might not get a glimpse of again.

“Calum, your cue’s coming up, you should get ready,” Michael said and Calum obliged, nodding his head as he walked away. Michael could feel the tension fade as soon as Calum was far enough from Ashton. The other people around them continued with their business now that the show was over.

Michael stepped closer to Ashton, pointing at stools they could sit on. “What was that about?”

“I noticed his outfit didn’t match his music and I pointed it out. Told him to change a few stuff. Wasn’t aware he hated being corrected,” Ashton replied, his shoulders’ defensive stance faltering.

“This is his thing, y’know,” Michael said, gesturing to the stage. “It’s what he thinks he does best and he prides himself in that. I don’t know why I’m telling you this but you obviously hit a nerve and you need to know these things. He loves his job more than anyone in this club. Since he started he had this passion for it, which I understand. The adrenaline, the attention, the women, the men, all of it. That passion never left him. Be subtle with your suggestions and make him think he realized it on his own. See, you both started on the wrong foot and it’s apparent that you hate each other -”

“I don’t hate him.”

“Okay, that’s a start,” Michael nodded, patting Ashton’s knee. “But he’s a soft one to crack. Looks tough but crumbles within the right reasons. Show him a dog and he’s all puppy dog eyes and pout. Just, he’ll warm up to you soon. He’s a people person, you were just too much smiles and energy.”

“You care so much for him, it’s admirable.”

“He’s my best friend, it comes with it,” Michael joked followed with light laughter. When Michael picks up that Calum’s set is almost over, he nudges Ashton.

“Showtime, newbie.”

When Calum gets off the stage, he walks past Ashton and purposely shoves him with his shoulder. If Michael hadn’t talk to Ashton beforehand, he would’ve retaliated but he listened to Michael and tried to let Calum’s anger simmer down.

“You talked to him, didn’t you?” Calum asked, knowing all of Michael’s tricks already. He sat down on the stool Ashton previously occupied, looking intently at Michael.

“What could I have possibly told him?”

“Don’t play dumb, asshat, you got this look. You did something.”

Calum was expecting an answer but Michael was distracted by the noise outside the room. There were cheers and screams and other noises. All elicited because of Ashton. So Michael was right, he had been doing this for ages.

Women were crowding the edge of the stage and reaching their hands up for Ashton, bills at a ready. Men were stuck on their seats, not bothering on crowding with the women. They were calling at Maya’s assistant, pointing Ashton as they whispered to her. It was a request. People requested for Ashton immediately.

“Well look at that, I was right,” Gene said, entering the room and surprising the pair.

“Right with?” Calum asked, standing up to take a peek at what Ashton was up to.

“Boy’s special,” he said, jutting his thumb behind him. “Knew he’d be an asset as soon as he called in for an interview. Look out, Hood. Got fierce competition now.”

Michael didn’t have time to turn to Calum as Maya came to him. “Someone’s looking for you,” she told him, pulling him up.

“Who?”

“Tall and blond, someone from last night. I forgot his name and I didn’t ask. Did say he’s looking for Mike. And assuming you’re the only Mike here, he’s looking for you.”

With that, he walked out the room, looking for whoever came for him. He was walking past people. Some regulars, some people from a bachelor party, some people dancing wildly to Ashton’s set. He didn’t pay much attention, all he wanted to see was who was looking for him and if it was Luke. He stopped near the entrance, disappointed in not seeing a familiar face.

“Mike?”


	4. i'll do my best to always be on your mind

"Mike?" the voice repeated, taking a tentative step towards Michael. 

Not recognizing the voice, Michael kept his head down even after seeing the person's shoes approaching him.

"Who's asking?" he asked, followed by a defeated sigh when he noticed the person wouldn’t leave him alone.

"Right, sorry. Name's Jack. Luke, my idiot of a brother, said he forgot his jacket here and he told me to look for a Mike," the stranger explained. "Doubt you remember him but he insisted I at least try to look for it."

With a mention of a brother, Michael looked up. The man looked familiar, he remembered seeing him talking to Luke for a brief moment while he was onstage. Luke’s his brother. "He gets the lap dance and you pick up his mess, what do I have to do to have a brother like you?" Michael couldn't help but tease, it helped him release the frustration he was feeling. Besides, this was the closest he can get to Luke at the time being.

"He had to work and he used the birthday card. Couldn't really deny him, I _was_ responsible for taking him here," Jack started. "So yeah, I doubt you remember him clearly but I hope you can help with the jacket?" Jack added, giving Michael a small smile.

Michael's face fell slightly because no, he can't help with the jacket. Soon as Luke left the room, he went to the backroom immediately. He was too ecstatic to do his usual routine before leaving a private session.

"Let me ask around, follow me," Michael said to buy more time, leading the way to the back room. Maybe some light conversation would give him more insight on Luke. "You're technically not allowed in so you could wait here for a while." Jack nodded and Michael went in.

"Hey," Michael said when he spotted Calum arranging his locker, getting his attention. "Any chance you know about a jacket left behind last night?"

Calum furrowed his brows, confused. "Nah, why are you looking for a jacket? You always put yours in your locker."

"Not for me. Customer’s looking for it.”

"We have a lost and found, drag them there."

"When's the lost and found ever been useful to anyone?"

Calum nodded. "Then no, sorry, man." Then a thought came to Calum. "Why are you helping this customer? Is it him? The blond from last night?" Calum said excitedly, mockingly or genuinely, Michael had no clue.

Michael shrugged, looking back at Jack who was thankfully looking away from the room. Calum followed Michael's line of sight. "Oh, he looks like him. I see why you're biased."

"Shut up, that's his brother. If you keep talking, he might hear you," Michael responded through gritted teeth. When he looked back at Jack, the older boy was smiling at him. Deciding Calum wasn’t going to be any help, he walked back to Jack.

"Any luck?" Jack asked, a hopeful tone in his voice.

Michael shook his head as he led the way once again, steering the way to the lost and found. “Sorry, we’re just not used to this. People don’t usually come back for stuff they left behind, you know, they come back for the stripping,” Michael explained, already losing his coherent thoughts.

Jack laughed lightly, clearly amused with Michael. From the limited description Luke gave him, babbling idiot wasn’t one of them.

“Mate, I know,” Jack said, still laughing softly. “We don’t have to look for it. Just wanted to humor Luke, maybe watch a few performances too.”

“Speaking of Luke,” God why couldn’t he just shut up. “Did he enjoy it?”

“Are you asking me if my brother enjoyed the lap dance?” Jack asked, laughing as he clutched his stomach. “Performance insecurities?”

Michael felt his face heat up, knowing he should’ve worded his question better. “N-no, I mean, the whole thing. You brought him here to celebrate his birthday, right?” Michael said, hiding the embarrassed tremble from his voice.

For the second time that night, he mentally scolded himself. He knew he was acting way too out of character. He wanted it to stop, but the only way he knows to stop it was unreachable.

“I couldn’t remember much, though he seemed put off by the end of it all. He was rushing to leave after he came back. Don’t take it the wrong way. You look like you’re awesome at what you do. He just thinks too much, maybe something came up,” Jack explained, patting Michael’s shoulder.

“Oh.” Michael felt himself deflate, subtly shrugging Jack’s hand. “Eh, we all have bad days. I should’ve made sure his first lap dance was memorable though,” he added quickly, covering the slight pang in his chest.

With his brow raised, Jack looked back at Michael. “How’d you know it was his first?”

“It becomes easy to figure out if you’ve been in the business for years.”

“You’re, like, 20,” Jack said, still amused by Michael. If he had a say, he’d be a good match for his brother.

“Almost 21,” Michael corrected, raising his finger for added emphasis. Michael was glad he had almost all of his confidence back. Maybe it was because the walls are coming up again. He wanted to blame it on Luke. Blame all of it on Luke. But that wasn’t fair; the other boy didn’t know how he affected Michael.

“I mean, in just a year, you can pick up the basics and ticks,” Michael continued, his turn to pat Jack’s shoulder. “That, and your brother is fairly easy to read. Blushes quickly too.”

“Oh God, please, please, don’t go into details. It was my idea but I certainly don’t want to hear my brother’s first lap dance,” Jack said, covering his ears immediately.

“How about his second?”

“Is there gonna be a second?” Jack replied, wiggling his eyebrows at Michael. Glancing at Michael’s wristwatch, he remembered he needed to report back to Luke. “Okay, this was fun but I have to get back to Princess Lukey. I’ll tell him you said hey.”

“Thanks. Also tell him he should come back soon.”

“You’d like that, won’t you?”

“Well, I do have some new moves I want you to hear about.”

*

“So stripper boy’s smitten,” was Jack’s greeting as he entered Luke’s flat. Looking around, he spotted his brother by the kitchen, preparing his dinner.

When Luke barely acknowledged him, he walked closer and repeated his statement. “So stripper boy’s smitten.”

“This is relevant because?” Luke asked, still completely convinced of his rationale from last night. “Did you find my jacket?”

“What crawled up your ass and died?” Jack said with a groan. Here he was trying to relay some good news and Luke was draining whatever energy Jack had. “And no, we couldn’t find it.”

“Sorry I wasted your time.”

“No time wasted, dear brother. I got to spend time with lover boy.”

Luke shook his head as he continued to cook. “Am I supposed to be interested? I don’t see the point,” he said, monotonous.

“He’s smitten with you, jackass.”

“Funny,” Luke replied, turning to face away from Jack. “He’s a stripper, Jack”

“Is that why you’re such a piss baby? Because the dude’s a stripper?” Jack said, followed by a loud sigh. “He’s still human, Luke. He’s capable of feelings. God, way to be so narrow-minded.”

“That isn’t the point.”

“You’re not making sense. You know, if you only heard how we talked about you, you’ll see _my_ point.”

Letting go of his plate, he faced Jack, who was now sitting by the kitchen island. “You talked about me?”

“You’re the only thing we had in common, of course we’d talk about you.”

“Where do I get the transcript of this conversation?”

Jack leaned forward and gestured for Luke to sit in front of him. “He asked if you liked it. And before you say anything, again, don’t go into details. I’m cool with all of this but it’s still weird because you’re my brother.”

“What did you tell him?”

“That you were ticked off when we left the club. I didn’t understand why though and I told him that. Honestly dude, did you not like it? Was he that terrible?”

Memories from last night came back to Luke and the blush was inevitable. “I-it was nice. He was great.”

“But?”

“He made me feel special, you know? Like it was important that I enjoyed it.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

Frustrated, Luke ran his fingers through his hair. “He _has_ to do that. I’d be stupid to think there’s some kind of special treatment, right?”

“I guess,” Jack said with a shrug. “You stay with that theory and I’ll say he wants you to go to the club again. Something about new moves?”

Luke’s head perked up to see Jack wasn’t where he was a few moments ago. “Need to go, Lukey. You’re not the youngest Hemmings anymore,” Jack said, already by the front door.

Quickly jogging towards Jack, he stopped the door to open further than it already was. “He actually said that I should come back?”

Jack patted Luke’s head as he scoffed. “He told me to tell you that you should go back soon.” Cutting Luke off before he could continue, Jack spoke ahead. “My son is waiting for me to come home. You deal with this problem of yours soon, okay? And if I were you, the answer is clear.”

“Then what is it?”

“Go back to the damn club. Clearly, both of you want that to happen.”

Knowing Jack was right, Luke nodded and let his brother leave.

*

As the days continued, Michael’s performance didn’t improve. He continued to miss his cues, forget steps in between dances, even slipped up with the pole a few times. He couldn’t even apply eyeliner since his hands couldn’t stay steady.

Luckily, Michael was only set for group performances during that week. He didn’t have to deal with attention only on him. Calum and Ashton could easily get all of the attention, especially with the obvious tension they set off.

Michael was left alone, low-key staring at whoever caught his eye. It became a tradition for him to stand by the door and “study” the crowd before the shows started.

"I'm just going to be honest and say it," Calum said, walking behind Michael before their group set started.

Confused, Michael turned around and raised a brow. "What about?"

"Your pining, it's pathetic."

"But I'm not... This isn't -"

"Shut up, you've been ogling at blonds since the night started," Calum explained, subtly pointing to the current blond Michael was staring at.

Michael chuckled then shook his head. "Nothing new, Cal. I always ogle at blonds. You did say I had a preference."

"But now it's different, right?" Calum teased, patting Michael's cheek to annoy him more. "This time you're looking for someone."

Michael stared at Calum, opening and closing his mouth, wanting to say something or defend himself. He couldn't form proper sentences. Michael wanted to deny it, say Calum's being ridiculous and he simply just enjoyed the view. He wanted Calum to be wrong so badly.

Cutting off Michael's current train of thought, Calum spoke again. "I don't want to sound rude but dude, fuck, he's probably not coming back. He sent his brother to fetch his damn jacket. This is hopeless. Shake the feeling, I'm begging you. I don't want to keep seeing you mess up onstage."

All Michael could respond with was a sigh. He knew the chances were slim. Luke was dragged by his brothers to go to the club, he most likely didn't think about going back. Still, that sliver of hope in Michael was stronger. "I know I just, what if I don't want to shake the feeling away?"

"Michael..."

"I wanna keep it."

“Are you sure you want to keep it? You could lose your job, Michael. You know Gene is serious with this business.”

Taking a step away from Calum, Michael shook his head. “Why don’t you stop worrying about me, mate, alright? Don’t you have Ashton’s dick to suck or something?” It was the best he could come up with to keep the conversation away from him.

“Y'know, I won’t hesitate to give you a proper reason to fuck up your performance,” Calum retorted, one foot already up.

Michael raised his hands in defense. “Was that supposed to be hush hush? Man, you stare at the guy like you’re ready to pounce 24/7,” Michael joked, his eyes roaming the room and trying to locate Ashton.

“Did that blond make you dumb too? I hate the guy, I already told you.”

“He doesn’t hate you, though.”

“Like I give a rat’s ass. If you like him so much maybe you should take him out, go have dinner, start dating him -”

Michael placed both of his hands on Calum’s shoulders, stopping his rambling in the process. “Calm down, seriously, you went from bitching about my ‘pining’ to bitching about Ashton. I just want you two to get along. The tension is too obvious, I bet everyone can feel it.”

“You’d lose that bet.”

When someone walked past them, Michael grabbed her arm and pulled her towards them. “Him and Ashton, thoughts?” Michael asked, a finger pointed at Calum.

“Aren’t you two a thing?” Calum’s eyes grew wide as he shook his head. “Oops, my bad. You argue like a married couple, we all just assumed. Before we saw him perform, we even thought Gene hired him for you.”

“Okay, that’s more than enough, thanks,” Michael said, dismissing their colleague before bursting into fits of laughter. “I think I’ve proven my point,” he tried to say in between laughs.

“You’re a dick.”

“But I’m not your favorite dick anymore. Unfortunately, I've been replaced.”

“You’re disgusting.”


	5. i gotta have you oh yes i do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank the amazing [Carly](http://archiveofourown.org/users/thesoulsailor) for being my beta for this chapter.

“Please make them stop,” Maya said, her voice pleading. She met Michael halfway when he entered the club. “I cannot take any more of their bickering,” she added, pointing to the backroom.

Without needing any further details, Michael already knew who she was talking about.

Calum and Ashton, definitely.

“What are they arguing about now?” Michael asked, an exasperated tone evident in his voice. He’d been the middle man for days and it was getting tiring.

“Who even knows at this point? They probably just argue so they have a reason to talk. It’s annoying, please make them stop.”

Michael sighed, already walking towards the increasing volume of the shouting. The volume increased with closer proximity. “I’m trying, Maya, but they’re both being extremely difficult.” He then turns to the pair. “Hey! Cut it!” Michael bellowed, thankfully shutting both of them up.

“It was his faul-”

“I don’t give a damn whose fault it is,” Michael said, not even picking up who spoke. “Can't you stop arguing just for one day, please?”

“No,” Calum said, crossing his arms. “And it wasn’t my fault today anyway.”

Michael picked up on Ashton’s disapproving shake of the head. “Fine, pin it all on me. You’re always such a saint, aren’t you?” Ashton said, raising his arms in mock surrender. “Always such a good boy.”

By this point, Michael couldn’t take more of this stupid banter. “Screw this,” he said, grabbing both of their wrists and pulling them forward. Surprisingly, both boys didn’t struggle to get free, both too stubborn. Maya decided to help by standing behind the three of them, ready to push in case either of the two would try to break free.

“We have three hours before the shows start. I’m not going to let you out until you settle whatever the fuck you have against each other,” Michael said, shoving Calum and Ashton in a closet.

As he closed the door and heard the click of the lock, he couldn’t help but add a remark. “Get each other off too, if you can, looks like you two need it.”

Michael then turned back to Maya with a smile, seeing the other performers behind her smiling at him. They were all probably glad Calum and Ashton’s arguing was out of earshot.

“Think that’ll work?” Maya asked.

“Hopefully or no one’s gonna see the show they came for.”

*

Ashton stood silently as he listened to Calum trying to locate the light switch.

“Michael couldn’t have thought of turning on the light before locking us in here, huh?” Ashton said, a clear distaste as his undertone.

“Shut up,” Calum seethed, pulling on the string that illuminated the room. “Don’t talk about Michael that way.”

Ashton crossed his arms and scoffed, leaning against the wall behind him. “If I were you, I’d admit I’m in love with Michael right now before blondie comes back.”

“What are you getting at?”

“You’re acting out, you know, picking fights with me just so Michael would stop thinking about Mr No Show,” Ashton explained, raising an eyebrow.

It was Calum’s turn to scoff. “Look who suddenly got out of his own head to try and understand someone else,” Calum teased, mimicking Ashton’s actions. “Finally got tired of thinking about yourself?”

“So you are? Like, in love with Michael?” Ashton asked, a slight quiver in his voice. If Calum noticed, it didn’t show.

“Do you think I’m _that_ cliche? The ‘falling for best friend but continues to watch in the sidelines while they pine over someone else’ cliche?”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Ashton nodded. “When you put it that way, that’s exactly what you look like to me.”

“Idiot,” Calum muttered, considering turning the light off again. Being with Ashton in such close proximity without the option of getting out felt too much for the dark haired boy.

Silence fell between them. Ashton was picking at the hem of his shirt, suddenly too worn out to react to Calum’s insult. He was pulling on a loose thread that resulted when he cut holes in his shirt. Calum, on the other hand, was staring at the ceiling. The top of his head pressed against the wall as he gently blew on the flop of hair on top of his forehead.

“I’m not, just so you know,” Calum finally said after moments of shuffling and heavy breaths inside the closet.

Ashton looked up and he didn’t seem to think Calum was lying. “I know.”

“Then why say it?”

“Wanted to get a rise out of you,” Ashton replied, finally looking up to see Calum still staring upward. “Didn’t know why you started hating me so I’m just doing what you’re doing to me. I have no idea how to do this ‘despise someone’ thing.”

Calum slowly looked down. He was silent but his eyes were moving, searching. He looked at Ashton but kept quiet, not wanting to utter a word to the blond boy. He was searching for an ulterior motive to Ashton’s lie (or what Calum convinced himself was a lie).

“It’s just,” Ashton started, both of his hands finding their way through his hair. “I’ve never had someone hate me before. Openly, I mean.”

Calum raised his eyebrows, a silent question that seemed to get across Ashton clearly.

“Man, you hated me immediately. And it felt awful, ‘cause people usually like me, you know? I was cocky, yes, but that usually works in breaking the ice. I wasn’t even offensive so I didn’t know why you hated me so much. Then you continued to hate me, you didn’t have to say it. All the glares you shot my way said it all. After a few days, I decided that maybe, if I pushed you too far, you’ll blurt out what I did wrong so I can finally have peace with myself,” Ashton explained, taking note of Calum’s constant nodding and sighs.

Again, Calum was silent but it wasn’t by choice. He had no idea what to say. Ashton sounded sincere and Calum wanted to convince himself that Ashton was lying. That Ashton only said it to use against him once they’re outside.

He couldn’t trust Ashton, he wanted so badly to believe that he couldn’t.

“You can at least respond.”

“You’re pathetic,” was what Calum said. Ashton stared at him with wide eyes and his mouth open. “I don’t buy it,” he added, walking towards the door.

Ashton grabbed Calum’s wrist, pulling the other boy towards him. “What do you mean you don’t ‘buy it’?” Ashton asked, frustration starting to get the better of him.

“That no one has ever expressed distaste towards you,” Calum said, trying his best to pull his wrist away from Ashton’s grip. “Highly impossible,” he added, settling with his fate and stopped struggling to get free when Ashton refused to let go. “Your aura screams asshole.”

Ashton only gripped Calum’s wrist tighter. “You’re so fucking stubborn, you know that?” he said, face getting closer to Calum’s. “I’m trying to settle things between us and you do this. We’ve been in here for almost an hour now, Calum, and all you did was make fun of me and judge me.”

Calum was about to interject but Ashton beat him to it. “No, you’ve talked enough and even if you haven’t, I’m tired of listening to you. Now, I just want to work even if I have to work with you. Michael probably sees right through you so let me do the talking. Nod when you feel it’s appropriate and go along to my plan.”

Calum nodded slowly as Ashton let go of his wrist. He walked past Calum and faced the door. “Clifford, we’ll stop arguing. Come on and let us out,” Ashton shouted, paired with loud thumps to the door.

“How was the head, Irwin?” Michael teased, voice slightly muffled through the door.

Ashton took hold of the knob and shook it violently. “Wonderful, mind-blowing, spectacular. Or do you wanna hear it live?” Ashton said, his voice laced with sarcasm while still shaking the knob.

“Only if you say please, Irwie.”

*

Luke couldn’t believe it when he found himself looking up directions to Temptation. In his defense, it was definitely better than asking Jack for directions.

He considered winging it and go there solely guided by his memory, but he wanted to get there fast. He had a better chance of getting to the lilac haired boy immediately if he was at the club as soon as possible.

For the past three days, he was in deep search for their song. It was unusual, he thought, that Mike used a song so different than what he expected. As he was being guided to the private room, the stifled music from the other rooms were upbeat and fun. This song was different. It was slow and it sounded… sincere. The feeling of victory when Luke found the song was unexplainable.

The song was playing softly as he started driving off, the lyrics already bouncing through his head matched with events from the night of his birthday.

Luke was humming to the song as he drove, recognizing some of the houses he spotted before while he tuned out his brothers.

He arrived just in time as he saw the bouncer letting a few people in and there wasn’t much people lining up yet. As he neared the front of the line, there was a thumping of the bass again. It was close to feeling like deja vu and he was glad his brothers weren't with him now.

As soon as he got inside he tried to find the girl who led him to the room. The sooner he would get to his request, the sooner he could finally have some peace of mind.

"Uhh, hey," was his opening statement when he spotted someone who resembled that they worked there. Internally, he was screaming at himself.

"Ready to request already? Shows haven't even started yet," she said and Luke was glad she knew what he wanted. "Who for?" Was he supposed to say Mike? He wasn't even sure if that's actually what he goes by.

"Mike, if possible? The one with the lilac hair," he said, deciding on that since it apparently worked for Jack a few weeks ago.

The girl nodded, listing something down on what she was holding. "Name?" she asked, looking back up at Luke. "You don't need to say your real one, love. I just like listing names, is all," she said, a warm smile gracing her features.

"Luke," he answered, nodding to himself.

"Thanks," she said, writing it down again. "You're in for a surprise, Luke, just a warning." Then she walked away, not even sparing a glance back at Luke.

He was sat by the bar, drinking whatever the special was for tonight. The only thing that mattered to him was what the girl had meant when she said he's in for a surprise. Did he just request for another Mike? Is he actually going to see Mike’s kinks like how he mentioned it last time? Is Mike going to be naked already? Anything could happen and Luke’s brain had a tendency of creating unrealistic scenarios.

Thank God his thoughts were cut off when the same girl from earlier approached him. “Luke?” she asked, tapping his shoulder lightly. He turned around with a smile, trying to hide his eagerness. “Follow me.”

It was the same corridor but it felt different. He already had an idea to what was in store for him, given he still had no clue what the ‘surprise’ was going to be but he was definitely looking forward to tonight.

As they were walking, he spotted someone vaguely familiar. It was one of the men onstage that night and he was surprised he could remember, his eyes never did leave Mike during the set.

The dark haired boy’s reaction to seeing Luke was odd. He was smiling, seeming to look extremely excited. He pointed the girl who was guiding Luke then he clapped once, not even bothered by Luke looking at him skeptically. As he walked away, Luke heard a soft “finally!” coming from the other boy. 

He wanted to ask the girl but he was too eager to get to the room, he decided he could just ask Mike if he'd be given the chance later.

"I'm supposed to tell you to enjoy but I bet you would, anyway. That boy never disappoints. You're in good hands, kid. Really good hands," she teased, leaving Luke in front of a door.

He tentatively walked towards the door, contemplating whether to knock or not. He decided on the latter and just opened the door.

"Took you long enough," he heard Mike say. He tried to locate the source and saw the other boy was leaning in one of the dark corners of the room.

"What?" Because that was the only thing he could ask. A surge of questions went through him instantly. Did this mean he remembered Luke? How did he know it was going to be him Luke? Why was he hiding in the corner?

"You've made me wait too long, Lukey," Mike said, taking slow strides towards Luke.

Luke's jaw dropped as soon as light illuminated more of Mike's features. "Blue," Luke said, staring at Mike's hair.

With a smug smile, Mike shrugged. "My hair? Yeah, couldn't get you out of my head so," the current blue haired boy said, only a few feet away from Luke. "Just made it more obvious."

"I like it," Luke said, finally getting a grip on their current situation. He took a step forward, any remaining space between them diminished. Luke reached up to brush some of Mike's hair away from his forehead. "Mike -"

"Michael."

Luke smiled, his hand trailing down to rest on the crook of Michael's neck. "Michael," Luke said, a smile still on his face.

"Yeah baby, say my name," Michael joked, leaning into Luke's touch.

Luke observed the room, seeing there wasn't a chair this time and the room was quiet, not even a faint sound of soft music. "Was this the surprise I was warned about," he said, reaching up to play with Michael hair again. "Or is there something else?"

Michael reached out and grabbed Luke's hand, pulling him towards a wall. "I wanna make this more interesting. Make up for the shitty one I gave you last time," Michael said, finally having Luke pressed against the wall.

"What? I never said anything."

"Your brother said you were in a piss mood when you came back to them. Am I not good enough for you, princess?" Michael leaned closer and placed a gentle kiss at the bottom of Luke's ear, nipping his earlobe after.

Moving his head to give Michael better access, Luke bit his lip to suppress a moan. "Y-you are," he managed to say, voice hoarse.

"Doesn't seem like it," Michael said, hand on Luke's hip, squeezing lightly as he peppered kisses on Luke's jaw.

A growl from the back of Luke's throat filled the silence in the room. He can feel Michael's smile against his skin as he reached for the hem of Michael's shirt, pushing it upwards to ground his nails on Michael's hip. "You are," he repeated, his head hitting the wall with a soft thump.

Michael pulled away, disentangling himself from Luke. He reached behind him to grab the shirt from behind, pulling it agonizingly slow. "Slower?" Michael teased, shirt halfway off of his body already. "Or are you growing impatient?"

"Michael," Luke whined, pushing himself off of the wall to reach where the other boy was standing.

“Stay against the wall or I’m not putting out,” Michael said with a stern expression, one hand pushing against Luke’s chest as his other hand tossed his shirt behind him. “And I wanna put out, so behave,” he mewled, pushing Luke backwards while his other hand was already under Luke’s shirt, tracing light patterns on his side.

“Who said _I_ was putting out?” Luke taunted, reaching up to trace the curves of Michael’s body while his other hand was on Michael’s hip, pulling him closer.

“This,” Michael whispered, as he pressed his thigh against Luke’s crotch. Michael’s lips return to Luke’s neck, his hands pushing Luke’s shirt to reveal his stomach and Michael couldn’t help but press his fingers hard, bruising. “Take your shirt off,” he said as he trailed kisses down Luke’s neck.

Michael only pulled back for Luke to take his shirt off then his lips were on Luke’s skin again. He started kissing and sucking by Luke’s collarbone, hesitantly leaving a mark. Michael started to kiss further down, open-mouthed and slow. As Michael neared Luke’s hips, the younger boy started thrusting to meet Michael’s lips.

Luke’s breath caught in his throat when Michael started to unbutton his jeans and pull the zipper down. He felt Michael’s hand on his pelvic bone, moving downward until it finally touched his hard cock through his boxers. Michael’s hand pumped slowly and Luke’s mouth fell open as he released a moan, the sound reverberating inside the room. “Fuck, Michael, please,” Luke whimpered, his voice was cracked and it pushed Michael to continue.

“Tell me what you want, I said I want you to be vocal,” Michael replied, voice equally cracked as his lips proceeded to kiss Luke’s skin and his hands pulling Luke’s pants down. Once the jeans were pooled around Luke’s ankles, Michael hooked his fingers to Luke’s boxers. He looked up to see Luke already looking down at him, his eyes waiting and expecting. “Please what, Lukey?” Michael asked, raising his eyebrow as if he was challenging Luke.

Luke groaned and when he failed to answer, Michael started mouthing his cock through his boxers. The older boy’s hands ended up on Luke’s back, inching down and pushed through the waistband of Luke’s boxers and started massaging Luke’s ass.

“Should I take this off?” Michael asked, voice muffled by Luke’s crotch as his lips were still slowly tracing Luke’s erection. When Michael felt Luke’s fingers thread through his hair and a gentle tug after, he took it as confirmation and finally freed Luke’s cock.

Michael took a few seconds to admire the sight before one hand wrapped around the base of Luke’s cock and the other hand rested on his hip. He kissed the head before leaning further down to drag the flat of his tongue on the underside of Luke’s shaft. He pressed soft kisses on Luke’s thighs, his hand pumping slowly and it slowly got further down, massaging Luke’s balls.

“M-Michael, fuck,” Luke moaned, pulling Michael’s hair when the other boy finally had his lips around Luke’s cock. Michael started to bob his head up and down, his hand pumping what he couldn’t take in. He hollowed his cheeks and hummed, sending vibrations through Luke, eliciting another loud moan from the boy. “God, oh God, fuck,” Luke said through his panting, looking down at Michael. “Look at me, oh fuck, fuck.”

Their eyes connected immediately and Luke watched intently as Michael expertly used his mouth on him. “You’re so good at sucking me off, fuck, I’m not gonna last long,” he whispered, not having much strength to use his voice. The warning just sent Michael to go faster, his tongue teasing the slit every once in a while before bobbing down. He had to push Luke further to the wall to stop him from choking the older of the two, as the other boy’s thrusts were getting faster but sloppier.

Luke tugged on Michael’s messy hair and the familiar feeling at the pit of his stomach was growing stronger. “I’m gonna -” he managed to say before his body tensed and he was coming in Michael’s mouth.

Luke was left to taking deep breaths as Michael sucked him dry and licked him clean before standing up again. He was met with Michael’s lust filled eyes, the green almost non-existent. Luke’s hand rested on Michael’s cheek, his thumb tracing the outline of Michael’s bottom lip. There was a thin sheet of sweat covering both of them and Luke’s breathing was still uneven.

“I want you,” Luke said, his mind finally catching up with the present.

“I think that’s obvious,” Michael joked, turning his face to give Luke’s palm a kiss.

“No,” Luke whined, shaking his head vigorously, acting like a child. “Mikey, listen to me,” Luke said, leaning forward to rest his forehead against Michael’s.

“I’m listening,” Michael said with a smile, hands immediately resting on Luke’s hips.

“I want you,” Luke started, scrunching his nose when he locked eyes with Michael.

“Yeah?”

“I want you to go on a date with me.”


	6. go ahead rip my heart out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long. I lost inspiration but gladly it's back!

“You fucking idiot!”

Calum and Michael were finally alone at the club, just like every Wednesday (Calum would always correct Michael saying it was technically already Thursday, but to Michael, it wasn't the next day until he went to sleep).

It was routine for the pair to talk about what went on during the night. They'd talk about anything covered by the club. It ranged from which people caught their eye while they were onstage to noteworthy encounters with people who requested for them. Calum, being the more requested out of the two, was usually the one with the juiciest story to tell.

Although tonight, it was Michael.

"What were you thinking?" Calum followed up, fighting his urge to grab the other boy's shoulders and shaking him violently. "Or rather, why weren't you thinking?" he added, raising his eyebrows to add emphasis.

Michael scoffed at Calum's reaction. He knew Calum wouldn't see the situation the same way he did. No one ever does.

"It wasn't the right thing to do," was Michael's choice of response. The words weighed on his tongue, not feeling right when he said it. He knew he made the right decision but his entire being screamed at him for making a mistake.

"You just gave him a blowjob!"

"Which just makes my point clearer."

"Please, pray tell, what is this ridiculous point you have?" Calum asked, sitting across from Michael, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. "Because to me, no point in the world would make your decision have any sense, whatsoever."

Michael sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair, gently tugging to keep him at ease. He wanted - no, _needed_ \- someone to understand and lashing out at Calum won't be any help to anyone involved.

"Lust," he mumbled and luckily Calum's hearing was good enough to understand him.

Calum shook his head and settled back on the chair's backrest. "I'm familiar with the word. Pretty sure you are too. We make a living out of it," Calum responded, his words were laced with a silent question.

Of course, Michael picked up on it. "The blond and I, it's all based on lust."

"He has a name, asshat."

" _Luke_ and I," Michael repeated, his tone almost mocking. "The only reason it started was because of lust. Nothing else, just pure hormones. Not even a connection to something we both like. Starting anything from that is a risky path to take."

It was always evident that Michael was a hopeless romantic. Calum had to endure listening to him endlessly hope the love of his life will just bump into him somewhere random and it would automatically click when their eyes met. Michael's 'no kiss on the lips' rule branched out from that. What he told Luke when they first met was true, that kind of kiss felt more personal and intimate and Michael only wanted to share that with someone who he knew reciprocated his feelings.

A nod indicated Calum's retreat from the argument. He was never one to argue with Michael's beliefs. One, he respected his best friend’s choices and two, he knew arguing was pointless.

The silence that followed felt thick between the two boys and it only took one look at Michael for Calum to know there was something else on his mind. Calum thought of his choice of words carefully, knowing how vulnerable Michael must've been feeling at that moment.

"But it's not just lust for you, is it?"

The miniscule nod Calum noticed was enough for him. He was ready to drop the topic when Michael finally spoke up.

"It doesn't make any sense, Cal! I shouldn't feel this way. This wasn't supposed to happen. I don't understand why I want to kiss him so much. A shit ton of customers asked me out before and I probably blew some of them too. He shouldn't be any different!" Michael was beyond frustrated now, his thoughts and his fatigue making a dangerous mix.

"Boy looks like a god and his jizz was magic, probably," Calum joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Fuck you," Michael spat but there was a small smile on his lips.

"Hey," Calum said, standing up to sit beside Michael and wrap his arm around the other boy's shoulder. "Worst case scenario: blondie doesn't feel the same way. He'll probably come back here though, depending on how you rejected him. What exactly did you tell him?"

Michael massaged his temples with his thumb and middle finger, his headache getting worse. He exhaled loudly as he leaned closer to Calum. "You're not sure about that."

"And then?"

"He looked surprised or something, probably offended. He pulled away then scoffed and fixed himself up before storming out of the room."

“You must’ve really offended him. You can sound patronizing even if you don’t want to be. He probably thought you think he’s not good enough for you,” Calum said, knowing that that was his initial feeling when Michael first started talking to him. Of course now he knew it wasn’t the case, but Luke didn’t.

Michael had both his hands pressed against his face as he continued to take deep breaths and collect his thoughts. He certainly doesn’t think Luke’s not good enough for him. His thoughts were far away from that. If anything, it was the other way around. What exactly does Luke think of him? Without the lust clouding Luke’s mind, does he see Michael as anything other than a stripper?

It took Michael a long time to accept that unless he’s providing service to them, most people won’t respect what he does. There were too many stereotypes that just never applied to him or to anyone he’s ever met. He understands, he does. He knows his way of providing for himself doesn’t exactly have a great appeal. It wasn’t the type of job people would crawl for just to get it.

The ultimate deal breaker now would be whether or not Luke is part of most of the people. He’s silently hoping Luke isn’t.

Calum patting his thigh shook him out of his thoughts. “Come on, let’s lock up. I bet you need some air,” Calum said as he stood up, walking over to grab the keys on Maya’s desk.

It took a few seconds for the action to register in Michael’s mind. “Why do you have your own keys?”

“Because I borrowed Maya’s spare.”

“What for?”

“I need to find storage for the bodies in my car for the morning before I throw them in the lake.”

“Morbid,” Michael deadpanned, stopping himself from rolling his eyes. “No, really, what for?”

Calum groaned and walked away from Michael, knowing Michael was going to follow after him. “For practice, okay? I thought I could go here earlier than the others so I could practice longer for my routine for tomorrow,” Calum cracked even when Michael didn’t say anything.

“You make it sound like it’s such a bad thing to want to practice,” Michael said, after he closed the doors behind him and hearing the click of the automatic lock. “Look, man, I know there’s a huge pressure on you with Gene unintentionally putting you in competition with Ash but you’re Calum Hood. This is your turf, you got this.”

“Please don’t say turf ever again,” Calum said as he started walking. “And when did you start calling him Ash?”

“We’re friends, you know, and nicknames are a thing,” Michael responded, catching up with Calum and walking beside him. “Jealous?”

Calum rolled his eyes as he gently elbowed Michael’s ribcage. “It’s not like I don’t want you to be friends with the guy. It’s just weird,” he said with a shrug.

He knew the answer but Michael still asked him. “Why’s it weird?”

“‘Cause… you’re my best friend and I hate him.”

“Hate is such a strong word.”

“What do you talk about?” Calum asked, dodging the whole ‘hate’ argument he was lately always having with Michael.

“You.”

Calum immediately stopped in his tracks while his breath caught on his throat. “Me? What about me?”

Michael’s laugh filled the sidewalk, even causing some dogs to start barking. “You make it too easy,” Michael said, clutching his stomach as he leaned forward to continue laughing.

After glaring at Michael for a few moments, he continued walking and left Michael alone.

“Cal, come back, please, you know I hate walking alone in the dark.”

*

Calum barely got any sleep before his alarm was blaring in his room. Surprisingly, he wasn’t as groggy as he thought he would be. His nerves are definitely making him feel like a different person. Or it was probably just because the day feels different in general.

It’s not like he doesn’t know his choreography because he does. He knows it well enough to perform it even if he was sleep deprived and uncoordinated. It was just the change that's bugging him. He barely uses a pole in his routines but still, he decided he might as well do something new.

Unfortunately, working with poles was one of his weakest points and he was never satisfied on how he executed his routine. He’d seen Michael do it with ease. The other boy moving fluidly against the pole, using it to his advantage to keep people’s minds reeling. Sometimes Michael’s feet don’t even touch the ground for more than five seconds when he uses the pole. If Michael used this skill to his advantage, Calum would gladly accept being replaced as star performer.

The song he decided to use for his routine was one of the best songs he has listened to in a while. It provided him to feel a kind of vulnerability laced with the words. The song being gender neutral also added to its allure.

It was a huge change for Calum since he normally worked with songs that were objectifying or songs that were blatantly about sex. He even got Maya’s opinion on the song just to feel the satisfaction that he could make it work. To which she responded with ‘you can make anything work, you’re Calum Hood.’ He’s been hearing that quite a lot and that should’ve made him feel better, but it just added to his nerves.

The second verse was where he had the most difficulty. It could barely be sung in one breath and he couldn’t move fast enough to match it. He was tempted to ask Michael for help but with his friend dealing with his own predicaments, he’d rather keep this problem to himself. While he had his other colleagues, they weren’t close enough for him to be able to ask for their help.

It was unusual to be at the club at that hour. He was at work at 10 AM when usually the place doesn’t have people in it until 4 PM.

Looking at the empty tables, it felt strange. There would normally be a few of his colleagues who watched him rehearse, saying they do it in hopes that Calum’s talent would pass to them. With a new song and a barren practice field, Calum was sure up to a lot of new things lately.

The dock was situated right behind the left side of the curtain, making it easier for him to get to if he needed the song to start over. He pressed play and listened to the song first, trying to get the feel of the lyrics filling the club. Eventually, he sang along, whispering ‘go ahead rip my heart out’ under his breath. After the song ended, he positioned himself behind the already parted curtain, ready to start his practice.

His first run through wasn’t smooth at all. The steps he took were too small that he didn’t get to the pole in time. Take two wasn’t close to being good either. His palms were too sweaty and the pole was not having it. His third attempt was worse; he forgot to wipe the pole which resulted for his hand to slip and almost hitting his head on the metal.

Calum didn’t even make it through a full dry run before he took a break. He was lying down on the stage with his legs bent on the knees so his feet were dangling on the edge. For the past few minutes, he was just staring at the ceiling, trying to even out his breathing.

“You’re too stiff, that’s why you can’t get it right,” a voice behind him said, successfully startling him.

Immediately, Calum sat up and turned to face where the voice came from, knowing exactly who owned the unpleasant noise that surprised him. “Dammit, Irwin, you don’t fucking sneak up on people like that,” he shouted, clutching his chest as he could feel his heart hammering. “Why are you even here, there’s like 5 hours left before anyone arrives for work.”

Ashton scoffed as he got down the stage and leaned back on a table in front of Calum. “I could ask you the same thing, but obviously this is what you’re doing,” he said, an obvious lilt in his tone, his hand gesturing from Calum to the pole. “Which is good, you’re taking the initiative, you need all the practice you can get.”

Calum’s jaw stiffened and his eyebrow raised, the anger he felt for the older boy resurfacing. Whatever they had talked about when Michael locked them in was completely forgotten. “What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, taking the remaining steps that separated them. He used the little height discrepancy to his advantage, making sure to make Ashton feel small. It didn’t faze the older boy though as Ashton stood up straighter and took on a squarer stance.

“Why do you always think everything I tell you is negative?” Ashton asked, pushing Calum back before walking to where the dock was. Calum watched as Ashton eyed his phone, probably reading the song ready to play.

“Well, isn’t it? Because you sure as hell make it sound like it is,” Calum replied, still curious as to why Ashton was there. “Why are you here so early?”

“Was out for a jog and decided to jog past the club. I saw the back door was slightly open so I checked it in case we were being robbed or the kids who broke the window last week came back,” Ashton answered as he pressed play on Calum’s phone, the song filling the club again. “Shouldn't you have chosen a slower song?”

“I don’t _do_ slow.”

“Can’t you try and talk to me without being a dick?” Ashton asked, pausing the song to return to where Calum stood. “And you _should_ do slow. It’s more sensual, not like you’d know how to do that.”

“I can do sensual,” Calum defended, crossing his arms.

“For all the weeks I’ve been working here, not once were you onstage being sensual. It’s all about aggressiveness with you, not exactly a good balance. You should be more diverse or eventually people will get bored with you,” Ashton explained, leaving Calum’s line of sight to approach the pole. “Come here,” he demanded and Calum wasn’t sure why he complied.

“What, are you going to show off again?” Calum asked, one of his hands holding the pole.

Ashton fought the urge to roll his eyes, dismissing Calum’s tone. “Did you bring your laptop with you?” Calum nodded.

“Good, but you should focus on practicing the basics first. Place one hand on the pole just slightly above your head and the other hand the same level with your hips,” Ashton said, standing back to look at Calum. “Now do a body roll,” Ashton instructed as soon as Calum was in position.

“I already know this.”

“Just do it.”

The movement was stiff, Calum was holding back and Ashton could sense it. Without hesitation, Ashton stood behind Calum and placed a hand on the other boy’s hip. “Seriously, you’re too tense, it’s making your body rigid and it’s restricting your movements. Just relax, okay?” Ashton instructed, his breath dangerously close to Calum’s ear.

Ashton’s hand started stroking Calum’s side, his grip tightening when it was back on Calum’s hip. “It’s better to start your roll from the bottom, you can let go of the hand that’s in level with your hips. Then loosen your grip on this hand, this is one source of your tension.” Ashton took a step back. “Now try it again.”

There was improvement, at least. Calum’s movement looked more effortless than his first attempt. Though, it wasn’t enough. “You suck,” Ashton deadpanned as he went back to stand in front of Calum.

“Oh my gosh, really? How kind of you to say that,” Calum jeered, rolling his eyes as he let go of the pole.

“Take your shirt off.”

“If this is your version of dirty talk, you ain’t getting anything from me, buddy.”

With an audible sigh, Ashton took the initiative and took off his own shirt. “You can work the pole better,” he said, lifting himself up easily while grabbing onto the pole. "See?"

Calum hummed as he nodded. "I do see," he muttered, giving Ashton a once-over. "Less clothes the better, then?" he added, promptly taking his shirt off.

"Why do you think this was adapted by strippers?"

"Right, whatever, I'm going to need to change everything then. The music, the wardrobe, everything," Calum said, walking past Ashton to head to the backroom.

A grip on Calum's wrist stopped him from getting further. "Stay, wardrobe isn't important right now and I'll edit the music for you. Just focus on practicing," Ashton said, gently pulling Calum back.

Knowing that listening to Ashton was his best choice, he complied. “The laptop is in the bag,” Calum said, jutting his thumb behind him where the bag was.

As soon as Ashton was busy and had headphones on, Calum started practicing again. With a sigh, he latched a leg on it then tried to go around but he slipped and fell. He heard a laugh from Ashton but when he looked at him, his eyes were still focused on the laptop screen.

“Something funny?”

Ashton looked up at him and grinned. “Just didn’t think that’s how I’m going to see you on your knees when we’re alone together,” he joked, winking at Calum before his attention returned to the laptop.

“That’s the only time you’ll see me on my knees,” Calum retorted as he approached where Ashton sat. “If anything, you’ll be the one on your knees.”

This time Ashton didn’t reply audibly, but Calum could see the small smile he had whilst trying his best to not look up. When Calum sat beside him, he shooed him away. “Leave me alone and go practice your little butt off,” Ashton said, one of his hands waving Calum away.

“Little?”

“What do you want me to call it? Perky?”

“Shut up.”

They both stayed silent as they focused on what they were doing. Calum was getting the hang of working the pole and was now trying to lift himself up. When Ashton finished editing, he shut the laptop and sat on one of the tables.

Smiling to himself, he leaned back on his chair and called out to Calum. “Yeah, baby, that’s it,” he said, pretending to be a customer. “Work it.”

Calum, knowing what Ashton was doing, rolled his eyes and stopped moving. “No one says ‘work it’ anymore, Irwin.”

“Just play along, would you, Hood?”

With a shrug, Calum returned to practicing, bending down on his knees with the pole between his legs and slowly standing up. Ashton watched closely, his eyes following Calum’s movements.

“What made you come to this stupid, dingy club?” Calum asked, his voice cutting through Ashton’s thoughts.

Right, they were playing a game that _he_ started. Ashton raised an eyebrow and pulled his chair closer to the stage. "Word on the street is there's a stripper here worth the money," he said, taking in the scene before him. He knows it wasn't the case, but he can't help but feel like Calum was dancing for him.

There was a glint in Calum's eye and then he started moving slower, proving to Ashton and himself that he can be sensual if he wanted to. He dropped again, his eyes meeting Ashton's and he smirked as he slowly snaked the pole upwards, grinding on it. When Calum's back was turned to him, Ashton stood up and climbed the stage, slowly inching closer to Calum.

“Customers aren’t allowed on the stage,” Calum said when he turned back to face Ashton, still playing along as he placed a hand on his hip.

“This should be an exception.” Then Ashton pushed Calum against the pole and captured his lips in a searing kiss. Calum’s hands were instantly on Ashton’s shoulders, pulling him in while Ashton had a firm grip of Calum’s waist.

The kiss lasted a few seconds before there was shattering glass ringing in their ears. Literally. Ashton pulled away first, his eyes opening to the sight of Calum biting his bottom lip and his eyes still closed.

"Damn those children," Ashton said and Calum slowly opened his eyes.

He was waiting for it. Waiting for Calum to shove him away or get mad for coming onto him. Although what he was waiting for didn’t come.

"And you said I can't do sensual."

Ashton was speechless; he didn’t expect that reaction from Calum. “What?”

“Proved you wrong.”

“I-I should get back to jogging or at least try to see the extent of the damage those kids did,” Ashton said as he pointed to the shattered window, taking a few steps away from Calum. “Continue practicing, can’t wait to see your set tonight.”

Then he was out of Calum’s sight.


	7. i could never resist so prepare to be noticed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quickest I've ever updated! Hopefully this speed carries on for the succeeding chapters.

It took Calum a while before he got back to practicing. His mind kept drifting back to the feeling of Ashton’s lips against his and the feeling of the cold metal his back was pressed against.

He didn’t like Ashton Irwin, absolutely not. That would be ridiculous. He just liked the feeling of kissing in general, that’s the only reason why he kept thinking about his and Ashton's kiss.

Soon enough, people started to arrive. Gene came first, like always, acknowledging Calum panting by the front of the stage before directly heading to the backroom. Maya followed soon after, laughing lightly as she saw Calum sprawled on the floor. More people started to arrive and some of them still wanting to watch Calum practice.

Calum was already in the backroom lounging on the couch when Michael arrived. He immediately looked around to see if Ashton was already there since he didn’t notice the older boy come in. It wasn’t normal for anyone to come in later than Michael since he’s usually always the tardiest.

Ashton was nowhere in sight and Calum was seething. First he kissed Calum which in turn gave him these conflicting emotions and now he’s not even going to show himself so Calum could get the answers he desperately needed.

It was almost time to open the doors when Ashton arrived. As soon as Calum spotted him, the dark haired boy saw red. He convinced himself it’s wrath and rage and whatever is synonymous to anger because it should be what he’s supposed to feel.

It’s what he told himself he’s supposed to feel.

Just yesterday he was sure he despised the older boy but now he can’t help but think about what Ashton’s lips would feel like on other parts of his body. He wondered if it would feel as electrifying as it was when it was on his lips. Then his thoughts shifted to Ashton’s hands and if it would hold him tight and if his touch would be rough enough that it would leave bruises on his skin.

Calum had to press his nails hard on his palms just to shake those unwanted thoughts away.

“Hey man, you okay?” Michael asked from his right side, successfully getting Calum out of his own head. “You seem on edge.”

Calum took a look at his palms and saw the deep crescents on it. He scoffed before facing Michael. “I’m perfectly fine,” he said with a nod. “Just great.”

Michael raised his brow like he was going to argue but dropped it. “By the way, Gene called for a meeting. He wants us there as soon as possible.”

When Calum got there, the group was already in a circle with Gene in the middle. It easily looked like a rap battle from the outside, Calum thought. At least he could still humor himself. He then squeezed himself between Michael and whoever was beside him, he didn't bother to see who it was. However, he avoided Michael’s gaze as he knew the other boy was still curious about his behavior from earlier.

Calum’s eyes then found Ashton in the crowd. It felt so easy to spot him now. Calum wanted to scream but he kept quiet and kept staring. Luckily for him everyone’s attention was on Gene so no one noticed, aside from Ashton. The older boy was uncomfortably shifting and Calum knew Ashton felt his stare.

“We can’t have it on a weekend, that’s when customer count is the highest during the week,” Michael said, pulling Calum’s attention back to the matter at hand. So that’s what the meeting was about.

“Michael does have a point.”

“A Monday?” Ashton suggested.

Gene seemed to be considering the idea but Calum's glare intensified. He wouldn't give Ashton the satisfaction of getting away with anything.

"That's not good," Calum said, the word _stupid_ just slightly hanging off of his tongue _._ "Everyone would be too tired from the weekend. It's better to make it a Tuesday. It's even the safest day to drive."

Michael chuckled beside him, knowing exactly why Calum argued in the first place.

"Solid argument," Gene said with a nod. "We're settling on a Tuesday, then?" he asked, acknowledging the entire staff. Nods and hums of approval were the only responses.

Calum went back to glaring at Ashton as the others settled on a specific date.

"So it's agreed, first Tuesday of September then we'll stay until Thursday. Does anyone have plans on these days?" Gene asked, close to adjourning the meeting. When no one said anything, he clapped his hands once. "Alright, mark your calendars. We finally have a date for the annual staff vacation."

As soon as Gene dismissed all of them, Calum pulled Ashton back while everyone else was rushing out the room to prepare for their sets.

“You don’t just walk out on someone like that,” Calum whisper yelled, pushing Ashton against a wall. His right arm was pressing Ashton’s shoulders back while his left hand gripped the side of Ashton’s shirt.

“I didn’t walk out,” Ashton said. It was a weak response considering he did walk out and left Calum alone.

“Oh right, my bad, you sprinted away from me. I think I even saw a smoke outline of you when you left.”

Ashton audibly exhaled as he placed a hand on Calum’s elbow, trying to push it away. “I’m sorry, okay?”

“I’m sorry? That’s the best you can tell me?” Calum asked, pushing his arm against Ashton harder. “You should be sorry. What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“I didn’t know what came over me.”

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Ashton, you know that’s not true. That wasn’t on impulse. You were 15 feet away from me, dammit, you obviously wanted that to happen.”

“Why are you stressing about it so much? You hate me.”

Calum's grip on Ashton's shirt tightened as his anger increased. "That's not the fucking point and you know it," Calum said, his nose pressed against Ashton's as his breath ghosted on the older boy's lips.

"What do you want me to tell you?" Ashton asked, completely spent. All he could do was pull his head away and lean it on the wall behind him.

"Why the fuck you did it."

"I..." Ashton started, too many words filling his mind. Whatever he wanted to tell Calum was stuck as a lump in his throat. He knew whatever he told Calum would just be spat back out on his face. "I don't know," he whispered, growing helpless.

That wasn't what he wanted to say, they both knew that. Calum's forehead was then pressed against Ashton's, both of their eyes closed as they breathed deeply. If one of them moved just a few centimeters, their lips would be touching.

"Hood, your cue is up next!" Maya shouted from the other side of the room. Realizing their current position, Calum sprung away from Ashton and left him against the wall.

He shook his head as he walked to his initial position. Ashton will not take this from him, he didn't work too hard just to be distracted. After he was introduced, the curtain parted. Revealing him in his last minute choice of wardrobe. The pole was directly in the middle of the small runway, waiting for him to finally show everyone what he had been practicing on all day.

He grabbed the pole as soon as he heard the first sound of a voice in the song. He spun a few times, slowly easing himself down the pole as the first lyric was sung. Calum knew he should give his all to this performance as he wasn't only proving he can do it to the crowd and Gene but also to himself. Possibly, maybe Ashton as well.

Speaking of Ashton, when Calum looked to the side of the stage, he caught a glimpse of the curly haired boy who was watching him intently. _No_ , he told himself. He shouldn't be affected by Ashton watching him. Their eyes locked in and he almost slipped but immediately picked himself back up as he wrapped a leg on the pole and lifted his body up.

The crowd was going wild. The women were by the side of the stage already eager to slip him their bills. Calum's confidence shot up as he kept his legs wrapped around the pole and started unbuttoning his shirt. He figured it was the best move to use for the second verse of the song. As planned, he threw his shirt to the crowd when the last few lines of the verse were sung.

Calum continued the routine as planned, a few improvisions as the women were making his choreography impossible to be executed properly.

With only a few lines of the song left, he shifted his body so it was completely facing where Ashton was. With a raised brow, Calum mouthed the words to Ashton as he slowly grinded against the pole for the finish to his set.

" _If you don't know then just let me go_."

*

Ever since Luke, Michael had been reluctant to take requests. He couldn’t say no, that's a given, but instead of giving it his best, he toned his effort down a quarter. His regulars were inevitably disappointed, expecting more from the boy but his mind just wasn’t into it. His _heart_ wasn't into it.

Every time he’d look around the private room all he could see was Luke. He remembers blindfolding and handcuffing Luke to the chair where his current customer sat. He remembers having Luke against the wall that was behind him, flushed and whimpering. Most importantly, he remembers Luke slamming the door just after he asked Michael on a date and was rejected.

He sighed as he leaned forward, placing his hands on top of the customer’s thighs. “Your first time here, huh?” Michael whispered as his lips brushed against the shell of the customer’s ear.

“How can you tell?” the customer asked. He didn't look like he was older than Michael by much, maybe a good 3 to 5 years or so.

“It comes with the job,” he replied, his thumbs lightly rubbing the insides of the customer’s thigh. When he heard a soft moan, he grinned to himself. “What name do you want me to whisper in your ear?”

Michael's hands inched closer, as his nose was slightly nudging the man's jaw. “Call me princess," the man replied, followed by a husky groan.

Michael’s hands stopped moving and he leaned away. This was a hallucination, it must be. Everything is laced with the thought of Luke, Michael must be dreaming. “You can’t be serious.”

“I thought strippers don’t judge.”

Michael scoffed, standing up straight to look down at the man in front of him. “I’m not judging, I just can’t call you that.” _I choose to not call you that_  was what he really meant.

“Aren’t you supposed to attend to my desires?” the man countered, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“Why do you have this idea of what a stripper does and think it applies to me?” Michael replied, his voice slightly raising in volume. He took a deep breath to calm himself down. He knew he shouldn’t pick a fight with a customer but lately he’s been acting on emotions without thinking about it first. “Yeah, okay, I'm sorry, let’s just start again,” he said after a few seconds, walking behind the man and sliding his hands down his arms.

Michael pressed his face against the junction of the man's neck and shoulder while his hands continued to roam the man's torso. He was acting on memory instead of instinct. This was how he acted when he first started out and knowing this was the man's first private session, he wouldn't know the difference.

The man seemed to be satisfied with Michael’s performance, assuring him that he’ll pay extra despite Michael almost picking a fight with him.

Still, Michael never called him princess.

Michael was facing the customer’s back as he wore his jacket, preparing to leave. “The girl who led me here was right, you definitely don’t disappoint,” the man said, turning around and placing his hands inside his jacket pockets.

“Just doing my job,” Michael said with a shrug.

“Really, I've seen how you are onstage and I've had my eye on you for a while,” the man started, taking one hand out of his pocket to reach for Michael’s wrist. “I’ve been visiting this club for a few weeks now but this was my first private session and I’m certainly not let down with the services.”

Michael’s attention should have shifted to the man’s words and his hand on Michael's wrist but it was focused on the piece of paper that fell from his pocket. “You dropped something,” Michael said, bending down to pick up the rectangular piece of paper. He flipped it around to see the name he was forcing himself to not think about the entire night. The world must really hate him.

“Thanks,” the man replied, placing a hand on the back of Michael’s neck.

Michael abruptly stood up and faced the man. “Your name is Luke?”

“Pardon?”

“You dropped your calling card,” Michael said, showing the man the writing on the paper. “Mr. Luke Hemmings.”

It took the man a while to respond, staring at the paper between Michael’s fingers. “That’s not my name," the man finally said, shaking his head. "This isn’t even really my jacket.”

Now it was Michael’s turn to be confused. “What?”

“I found this jacket left by the bar a couple weeks ago, no one seemed to own it so I just took it. I forgot about it and I was in a rush to leave a while ago and this was the first thing I grabbed.”

No. It couldn’t be. It was too good to be true. Michael wanted to dismiss the thoughts that the jacket that was worn by the man in front of him belonged to Luke. _His_ Luke.

Michael silently debated with himself on the probability that it was actually Luke's. Luke was a common name and surely more than one Luke went to Temptation. Though how many Lukes lost their jacket in the past few weeks...

“Give me the jacket.”

“Is it yours?”

“It belongs to my…” He doesn’t even know what he and Luke are. “... friend,” he decided to settle with.

The man was hesitant but still took the jacket off. “It’s pretty chilly outside, can’t I just bring it back when I come back?” he asked, handing the piece of clothing to Michael.

“No, this needs to be returned immediately.”

“Alright, I’ll go then, I guess,” the man said, taking a few steps back. “I’ll make sure to request for you again when I decide to return.”

With a fake smile he had perfected long ago, Michael looked back at the man. “Looking forward to it.”

As soon as the door was shut, Michael went back to scrutinizing the paper still in his hand. He sat down on the chair as his mind spinned. It was possible it was Luke’s calling card and his thumbs were itching to dial the numbers at the bottom of Luke’s name.

*

Michael returned to the backroom after a few minutes of silence in the private room. He decided for himself that he couldn't call the number, he was too much of a coward.

“Trying to pick a fight with a piece of paper?”

Michael looked up to see Ashton smirking. He knew he was looking at the card but he wasn’t aware he was glaring at it. “‘m not,” Michael replied, sticking his tongue out.

“Apparently I’m talking to a six year old.”

“Shut up,” was Michael’s retort as he shifted on his seat, fixing the jacket on his lap.

Ashton sat next to Michael to take a peek at what’s on the paper. Michael tried to keep it out of Ashton’s sight but his eyes caught on the writing fast.

“Is that blondie’s?” Ashton asked, grinning widely at Michael.

“No," Michael said, placing the card faced down on one of his palms.

“I really am talking to a six year old,” Ashton said with a small shake of his head. “Call him," Ashton urged, nudging Michael with his elbow.

Michael stared at Ashton wide eyed like he just suggested the worst thing in the world. “You’re joking, right?”

“What? You obviously like the guy, what’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“My own words said back to me,” Michael said, remembering Luke’s face dropping as he said _you’re not sure about that._

Ashton audibly sighed and took to paper away from Michael. “Know what, if you’re gonna act like a child then I’m going to treat you like a child,” he said, making sure the paper was out of Michael’s reach. “You’re not gonna get this back until you realize what you have to do.” With that, Ashton walked away from a sulking Michael.

At first Ashton had no idea what he was going to do with the information he now held in his hands. Then he spotted Calum talking to a few of their colleagues. He didn’t want to do it but Michael's his friend and he wanted to stop seeing the other boy looking so lost and miserable. He knows he needs to push past whatever he was having with Calum at the moment so they could both help their friend.

He approached the small group slowly. “Calum, can I talk to you for a while?” Ashton said, calling everyone’s attention. Calum glared at him for a few seconds before standing up and leading Ashton away from prying ears.

“What do you want, Ashton?” Calum said, voice flat and uninterested.

Ashton forced himself not to snap back at Calum's attitude. “I got this from Michael,” he said instead, handing Calum the card.

Calum looked at it for a while, not understanding its importance but soon his eyes grew wide in recognition and he gasped. “Is this… No… It can't be... Really?”

“I think so, I’m not entirely certain. Michael was glaring at it, though.”

Calum had to cover his mouth to suppress his excitement. “Where did he get this?”

“From a jacket, I think. He was clutching one a while ago,” Ashton explained. “I told him to call but he wasn’t keen on the idea so I took it from him,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn't know what else to do."

“Well, aren't you an asshole,” Calum said, not being able to stop himself. His attention moved back on the card, he added, “He must’ve finally found the jacket.”

Ashton raised an eyebrow, completely out of the loop. “What jacket?”

“Luke lost it when he first came by here then his brother came back and looked for it a few weeks ago. It wasn't in the lost and found and no one had seen it.” Calum said. "You don't really know anything, do you?"

“Right now, this isn't about us so shut up and help me think of a plan.”

Calum took his phone out of his pocket and was swiftly pressing buttons. “Already ahead of you.”

Ashton was about to say something but Calum just held a hand against his face. After three rings, the phone was picked up.

“Ah yes, hello, is this Luke Hemmings?”

The voice from the other line seemed unsure but still responded. “This is him. Who's this?”

Ashton saw a spark in Calum’s eyes as the other boy grinned. “This is Calum, from Temptation. I think we might have found your jacket.”

“Oh, thank you,” Luke said, a slight pause on his end sounding as if he was expecting to hear something else. “You didn’t have to go through too much trouble, did you? I hate to be burden.”

“Not much, it really just showed itself,” Calum said, leaving _when we needed it the most_ unsaid.

“Again, thank you. I guess I could come pick it up soon?” Calum noticed that Luke’s voice continued to sound unsure but he tried to make his voice steady as much as possible.

Calum thought for a while, trying to remember what Michael’s routines were for the next few days. “Is Saturday good?”

“Sure, Saturday is good. I’ll see you then.”


	8. we can bring it on the floor

Luke’s immediate reaction after getting home from work was flopping down on his bed, not having any energy left for anything else. Trying so hard not to mix work and personal problems was incredibly draining. Whoever can keep a smile on their face for eight hours while dealing with something outside of work was a god in Luke’s eyes right now.

As he stared at the chipping paint on his ceiling, his mind couldn’t help but drift to the thought of Michael. Maybe - no, _definitely_ things would have been different if he hadn’t opened his mouth.

It was a Thursday night and he was sulking in bed, alone. He almost felt bad for himself but he figured this was all his doing. Truth be told, he’d rather be alone under the blinding strobe lights and surrounded by the heavy bass of Temptation than be alone in the darkness of his bedroom. He had no reason to return to the club though, so he remained motionless on his sheets.

His thoughts were cut short when his phone started ringing from his pocket. He took a quick glance at the time and can’t believe that he had been lost in thought for hours. Without thinking further, he answered the call and pressed his phone against his cheek.

“Ah yes, hello, is this Luke Hemmings?” the voice on the other end asked. At first he thought it was ridiculous to call someone then ask for their name, then he remembered the calling cards he’d been handing out under his boss’ orders. Still, who calls someone at two in the morning?

“This is him,” Luke responded, immediately regretting his choice of words. “Who’s this?”

There was a shift in tone on the caller’s end. “This is Calum, from Temptation. I think we might have found your jacket.”

“Oh, thank you,” he replied. Luke wanted to laugh, maybe even scream. Of all the things Temptation could give back to him, it was his damn jacket. Couldn’t they have returned his dignity too? He wasn’t even aware of who this Calum guy was. “You didn’t have to go through so much trouble, did you? I hate to be a burden,” he continued.

A new fact he discovered about himself, he sounds more formal in the middle of the night than when he’s at work.

“Not much, it really just showed itself.”

“Again, thank you. I guess I could come pick it up soon?” He wanted to take the words back but of course he can’t. Maybe he was dreaming of this conversation. He knew he wouldn’t say anything he had just said if he was awake. There was a lengthy pause on the other end and Luke took it as an opportunity to pinch himself.

He was definitely awake.

After a few seconds, Calum spoke again. “Is Saturday good?”

“Sure, Saturday is good. I’ll see you then,” Luke said before promptly ending the call. He would have thrown his phone against the wall if he had the energy and the money to replace a broken phone.

He closed his eyes as he reached behind him to grab one of his pillows and scream into it. He can’t believe he couldn’t convince himself to not go.

This was his life now.

*

When Saturday finally came, Calum was on the edge. He kept walking to the door to take a peek at the crowd in hopes to see a familiar blond and when he doesn’t spot him, he’d go back into the room and start pacing. It became a cycle before Ashton had enough of it.

“Can you stop that?” Ashton complained, glaring at Calum who still continued to pace. “You’re giving me a headache.”

“Here’s a thought, you can stop watching me,” Calum said, still pacing but now only to piss Ashton off. “Can’t you focus on something else? Like your set, maybe, or are you too good that you never have to practice anymore?”

Ashton sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “If you actually try and stop with this blind hatred, you’d know I’m only on for group tonight,” Ashton said, closing his eyes to stop them from rolling. It felt like Calum’s life mission was to get on his last nerve. “We were just getting along, why do you have to be such a dick?”

Calum’s eyebrows shot up as he looked back at Ashton with an amused expression. “Getting along? You thought that was getting along?” He scoffed. “You came to me so we could help my best friend. Please, this isn’t friendship in the slightest. This is just a partnership albeit without the mutual trust and respect.”

“Why are you so damn difficult?”

“Why are you so annoying?”

Ashton smirked as he leaned back and got more comfortable on the couch. “This is all for your benefit, sweetheart,” he said, chuckling softly when he saw Calum’s face turn a shade of red. Whether it was out of anger or embarrassment, Ashton still found it humorous. “Moving on, why is it so important for Ken to be here tonight?”

“Ken? His name’s Luke.”

“No, I mean like Barbie’s --”

“I’m messing with you, I know what you meant,” Calum said, taking his last glance at the crowd before the DJ called on for the first performance of the night. “If you must know, this week is apparently about leaving the comfort zone,” Calum answered, finally acknowledging Ashton’s question when he turned back to the older boy.

“Kinda vague, mate.”

“Ask him yourself then,” Calum said, looking around to see if he could find Michael anywhere in the room. “Michael!” he shouted, getting Michael’s attention who was by his locker tapping along to the song currently playing in the backroom speakers.

As soon as Michael reached where Calum was, he was surprised to see that Ashton was with him. “And you two haven’t killed each other yet, I should document this progress,” Michael teased, followed by a short laugh. “Anyway, what’s up?”

“Ashton’s curious about your set for tonight.”

“Oh,” Michael said with a hint of a smile like he was proud of what he had planned. “I want to get someone up on stage with me,” he continued while the gears in Ashton’s head were working to try and connect the pieces. “Get someone from the crowd then have them be a part of the routine. Figure it would up my game since I’ve been downgrading lately.”

The realization struck Ashton as soon as he heard _from the crowd_ and he had to stop himself from grinning. He hated to admit it but Calum’s a genius. Well, at least he only had to admit that to himself. Although Ashton couldn’t help but wonder if Calum had thought it through. If Luke would actually come, the chances of Michael actually picking Luke from the crowd were slim to none.

“Hey, how about we pick someone out for you in advance?” Ashton suggested, picking up the slack from Calum’s plan.

It took a few seconds before Calum was nodding furiously beside him. “Yeah, you love surprises and it’s gonna be a great challenge.”

Michael should’ve realized by now how strange the situation was but Ashton figured he was too excited for his set to realize it. Now, Ashton hopes the excitement doesn’t leave him if his and Calum’s plan would be successful.

“Yeah, fine, just don’t let me experience what happened to Ren,” Michael said, mostly to Calum since Ashton wasn’t present when that happened. “Don’t get someone who’s unresponsive as a rock, I don’t need to spiral down further.”

Calum and Ashton smiled at the same time. “Don’t worry,” Calum said, placing a hand on Michael’s shoulder. “We’ll make sure they’re up to your standards.”

“Fine, whatever,” Michael said, shrugging Calum’s hand off his shoulder. “And wipe that grin off your face, it’s creepy. You too, Irwin.”

With a triumphant nod from Ashton and Calum, Michael walked away.

As soon as Michael was out of earshot, Calum’s grin dropped when he faced Ashton. “What if he doesn’t come?”

“Chill,” Ashton said, pushing Calum towards the couch as he took a peek at the crowd. It took a few seconds and he wasn’t even sure but he spotted a blond by the bar. “Is that him?” Ashton asked, waiting for Calum to reach his side then he pointed to the direction of the lone blond.

Coincidentally, the blond turned to the side for Calum to see a glance of his profile. He didn’t have to answer since he sprinted out of the door. Ashton followed suit.

It was funny how Calum was approaching Luke like the blond was prey and he’d scurry off if he wasn’t approached with caution. “You know, it’s obvious he looks bigger than the both of us. You won’t scare him away,” Ashton joked when he was close enough to Calum.

“Yeah, but he’s like Bambi,” Calum responded, slowing down again. Ashton was surprised Luke hadn’t turned to the pair who was awkwardly walking towards him.

“Looks can be deceiving, he could know how to box for all we know,” Ashton said and it seemed that Calum had finally listened to him as the other boy was already talking to Luke.

“-- scotch on the rocks kind of person,” was what Ashton heard when he got close enough to Calum and Luke. Calum did have a different approach with introductions, Ashton was completely aware of that.

“If I didn’t know better, it sounds like you’re hitting on me,” Luke said, taking another sip from his glass.

Before Calum could respond, Ashton spoke up, “Hey, ‘m Ashton.”

Luke looked back and forth between Calum and Ashton, narrowed his eyes for a bit but then just nodded. “‘m Luke,” he said, offering his hand for Ashton to shake.

“We know, you’ve been quite the talk here,” Ashton said, even though he knew he shouldn’t have said that. Fortunately, Luke still laughed.

“That’s awful, you could’ve had a better topic,” Luke said before he turned back to Calum. “If the phone didn’t fuck up your voice too much, then you must be Calum,” he said, extending his hand again.

“I was going to ask why you’re so formal but the calling card already explains enough,” Calum said after letting go of Luke’s hand.

“So, can I have my jacket now? I don’t really wanna stay here for long,” Luke said, finishing off the last of his drink before standing up from his stool.

“Don’t you wanna stay for a while and wait for Michael’s set?” Calum asked, calling the bartender over to order a round for the three of them.

Luke visibly tensed as he took a small step away from Calum and Ashton. “I’m not here for Michael,” Luke said with a frown. “Can I just have my jacket so I can leave?”

“I just want you to know that Michael means well,” Calum said, pushing one of the glasses the bartender just placed towards Luke.

“Oh, so he told you the story, then,” Luke said with a scoff. “If what happened is him meaning well then I wouldn’t want to know what happens when he doesn’t mean well,” he continued, pushing his chair back against the bar. “Know what, forget the damn jacket, I’m leaving.”

"Wait," Calum and Ashton said at the same time as they both tried to hold onto Luke's wrist.

“He’s been sulking,” Ashton said, obviously still having difficulty knowing what information to disclose to Luke. He knew Calum elbowing his ribs was well deserved.

“What he meant to say was that you probably misunderstood Michael’s intentions,” Calum said with a hesitant smile. “Please, give him a chance to redeem himself.”

“Then why isn’t he here with the two of you,” Luke questioned with a raised brow.

“He doesn’t know you’re here tonight,” Ashton said. Luke opened his mouth to say something but Ashton beat him to it. “But he will if you come up onstage for his set,” he added with a hopeful glint in his eye.

Luke’s eyes grew wide then he was shaking his head. “No, that’s not happening. Why would I even want to go on that stage?”

“Come on, it’s like a free lap dance,” Calum said, the smile on his face widening at Luke’s expression. “I’m pretty sure you were extremely satisfied with the previous ones, especially the second,” Calum added, the smug look on his face made Luke’s remaining composure crumble.

Luke raised his hands in defeat as he stepped farther away from the pair. “He told you everything? Then no, the slim chance you had of me agreeing to this is gone.”

“So you _were_ considering it?”

“That isn’t the point, Ashton,” Luke said, already growing more and more frustrated. “If he told Calum that then what else has he told him?”

“He told me he’s worried, well it was implied that he was worried. He isn’t sure what you want out of all of this,” Calum said with his voice soft, not sure how far he can go without breaking Michael’s trust.

Luke didn’t audibly answer but his expression said it all.

Calum took a deep breath before glancing at the current person onstage. Clearly there were only a few minutes left before it was Michael’s cue. “I have to make this quick because Michael’s up next, just hear me out, okay?”

As soon as Luke nodded, Calum continued. “So I know you tried to kiss him. And he dodged the kiss, yeah? That’s Michael for you. He gets attached easily but he doesn’t want it to have it something solid so he can convince himself he’s not attached yet. He wanted to, you know, but he was nervous, maybe even scared. That’s why _that_ happened when you came back, he wanted to see if he just needed to get it out of his system. It wasn’t the case though, but for fucks sakes, he dyed his hair for you, of course it wasn’t the case. Just be patient with him. He’s obviously already there but he refuses to accept it.”

Luke huffed and deflated but agreed anyway. "Fine, but my patience is thin. I'm not gonna wait around for him to stop acting like a coward," Luke said, crossing his arms.

"Fair enough," Ashton said with a nod as he nudged Calum to go ahead and call Maya. "Maya's gonna tell you when you should go up so stick around her for a bit, Calum's just gonna get her."

"Yeah, alright, thanks."

"You make this sound like it's for my benefit more than it's yours," Ashton teased.

Luke laughed and raised a brow. "Looks like it’s evenly for our benefit."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know. There's something, a vibe, I guess. Something about you and Calum... There's a thing between you two, right?" Luke said, looking around quickly in case Calum was on his way to return.

Ashton laughed, almost sounding bitter. "Oh please, he's hated me since the first word I spoke to him."

"But... you're working together, like not just _work,_ you're helping Michael together, right? Nothing adds up."

"That's my whole relationship with Calum to you."

After Luke nodded, silence fell between the two boys as they waited for Maya and Calum to come back. Ashton couldn’t help think if they - _he_ \- was actually that obvious. Surely, Michael haven’t told anything about him and Calum to Luke. Ashton felt uneasy suddenly, his thoughts running and it's making his head spin too fast. Luckily his thoughts stopped as soon as he heard Maya speak to Luke.

“By the looks of it, you’re like Michael’s jealous boyfriend who wants to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid while at work,” she joked, making Luke nervously laugh.

“I’ve only been here three times, that can’t even be considered a regular, let alone a jealous boyfriend,” Luke shot back and Ashton’s glad Luke is less defensive around Maya than he was just a while ago.

Maya grinned, seeming to enjoy Luke's retort. "You're different, obviously. Regulars usually don't have regulars," she said, he grin just growing. When Luke showed a confused expression she elaborated. "I mean, regulars often rotate who they request for... _You_ have been fixated on Michael."

"Nothing wrong with a little favoritism," Luke joked with a shrug.

"Of course," Maya beamed just as the lights turned brighter again, signaling the end of the current set and the intro to Michael's. "Time to shine."

*

Michael was listening intently for his cue while trying to prepare himself to whoever Calum and Ashton had chosen to be onstage with him tonight. He was slightly nervous that no one would be willing to take the chance but he still had confidence in his best friend's persuasive skills.

It's gonna be the first time he's doing it, giving a lap dance to someone with an audience. It's both exciting and nerve wracking.

When he heard his cue, he put on his best face and stepped out of the parted curtains.

His eyes almost bugged out of their sockets as soon as he saw who was seated in the chair by his right on the stage. He must’ve been hallucinating, he's turned delusional. He hadn't even thought of Luke the entire night and now he just had to be there, waiting for Michael to approach him. Can't he just have one night of peace? That's all he's asking for. Michael shook his head and took his eyes off of Luke, who had his eyes out somewhere in the crowd.

"Temptation!" he addressed the crowd, earning a few howls and cheers. "Tonight I'm trying something different," he continued, walking a bit closer behind where Luke's seated. "My _friend_ here is going to help me out," he said, the word friend leaving a heavy feeling in his mouth while he had a hand caressing the back of Luke's head.

"What are you doing here?" he asked after he draped his arms on Luke's shoulders, leaning forward to press his lips against the shell of Luke's ear. "Don't want you running off again," he whispered, nibbling a bit of Luke's earlobe.

"I - I wasn't here for you," Luke answered, his eyes instinctively closing to the feeling of Michael behind him.

Michael hummed, his hands pushing forwards on Luke's thighs. "Wasn't," he said, his grin pressed against Luke's neck. "So now you are?" he teased, pulling his entire body back and feeling proud at the little whine Luke made.

He focused again on the attention the crowd was giving him. Luke was pliant on the chair as Michael started to take off his button up, unbuttoning agonizingly slow. When he reached the last button, he walked to the end of the runway and made a show of taking it off his shoulders and then throwing it to a group of girls who were the loudest so far. When he winked in a general direction and the crowd was almost in hysterics, he knew he's gotten most of his credibility back.

Walking back to Luke was a fun sight. The blond had his gaze on Michael's chest, his eyes glassy and pleading, almost.

"Hey," he smiled at Luke, enjoying the other boy's reactions. Next thing he did was to pull the chair to the middle of the stage, letting Luke's back face the crowd. "How are you feeling?" he whispered, rubbing his thumb on Luke's cheek for a split second before he stood up straight and grabbed Luke's hands to place on his chest.

"I'm still upset with you," Luke responded, his eyes finally locking with Michael's.

Michael had a triumphant smile when he felt Luke's hands trail slowly downwards. "Yet you agreed to be onstage with me."

"Doesn't mean anything," Luke said, his eyes shifting from Michael's lips to his eyes. The tone was teasing and Michael was glad there was no heat to Luke's words. He wouldn't be able to know what to do if Luke held a grudge.

"Obviously," Michael replied, matching Luke's tone. "How could I think this means anything?" he continued, straddling Luke's waist and wrapping his arms around Luke's neck.

He looked back at the crowd and smirked. As cliche as it sounded, he's happy to hit two birds with one stone. He grinded his hips slowly against Luke's, drowning out the sounds of the crowd.

"I know what you wanna say," Luke said before Michael even had the chance to plead his case. Michael chuckled at that since he doesn't even know what he wanted to say. He continued to grind against Luke, making the blond's head lull back with his mouth ajar. Michael knew he needed to multitask; he needed to focus on both Luke and still please the crowd.

"Enlighten me," he said as he descended Luke's body, leaving a warm feeling every time he breathed against Luke's torso. When he was face to face with Luke's crotch, he was again aware of the audience and how they couldn't see what he was doing. With a strong pull, he turned the chair to face the side and giving the crowd the side view of what he was doing.

"Calum told me," Luke said, one of his hands finding its way to Michael's hair. "You wanna know what I want from all of this."

Michael closed his eyes when he felt Luke's hands, moving closer to his touch. "More or less," Michael said with a hum. "Are we seriously talking about this now?"

"What's better than now?"

"After hours? Tomorrow morning? Any time I'm not in the middle of a damn performance?" Michael said, surprising Luke when he lifted his legs and placed them on his shoulders. "We need to get better at timing," he continued, slowly standing up to give Luke an idea to what he was about to do.

Next thing he knows, Luke was up in the air with his legs dangling on Michael's back and Michael's face still firmly pressed in between his legs. "What are you doing?" Luke asked, his grip on Michael's hair tightening. Admittedly, he was surprised with Michael's strength.

"Putting on a show," Michael said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I'm in the middle of working, in case you haven't picked up on what I was hinting."

"It's not like I can get a hold on you later after all this," Luke said flatly, feeling himself going down. After that he was lying on the ground, Michael crawling up closer to his face.

"Why do you sound like a jealous boyfriend?" Michael teased, rolling his body to touch Luke's for a second before it was hovering above him again.

"We could've been progressing to that by now," Luke said, trying his hardest to keep his voice steady and he was keeping himself from moaning.

Michael placed his hands right next to Luke's head, successfully keeping him in place. "Can we seriously talk about this later? I can't grind on you while talking about problems and feelings," Michael explained, looking back at the crowd since he seemed to be neglecting them once more.

“I just want to hear you say it.”

“Say what?”

Luke grabbed Michael’s hips to still him for a while. “I don’t know, some reassurance, anything. I already laid everything out in the open,” Luke said, the playful glint in his eyes gone as his gaze turned stern. “Maybe how you have the decency to question my intentions when _I_ asked you out?”

Michael released a sigh of defeat before sitting on Luke’s thighs. “Let’s talk about this after my set, please?” Michael asked, his thumb stroking Luke’s cheek. “Stay in the backroom for a while, just, please, let me finish working, okay?”

“Yeah, fine, okay,” Luke said with a hesitant nod. “I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this.”

“Give me a chance.”

“This is your last.”

*

Entering the backroom was, for the lack of a better term, beyond awkward. From what Calum and Ashton had told him, some of these people will know him. If not, once he says his name, they’d probably figure out who he is.

As soon as Luke stepped into the room, people’s eyes were on him. They looked curious for the most part, but shrugged it off soon enough and went back to their business. If he’s being honest, he was expecting that someone would approach him and ask him if he’s lost. It must’ve happened often, non-employees just lounging in the backroom waiting for someone to come back after their performance. Although Jack had mentioned he wasn’t allowed to go in the back, so maybe it was a special case for him. He shook his head and tried to get that thought out of his head. That wasn’t the real issue he had to deal with.

He was hoping at least Ashton or Calum would’ve been back there with him, at least he’d conversed with them already and the unsettling feeling of meeting them was already gone. They were probably called to table and Luke wouldn’t be surprised if his assumption was proven true.

Seeing an unoccupied couch by the far side of the room, Luke sat silently and was thankful the horrendous beat of the club music was muffled there.

“What did you talk about?” came a voice that startled Luke. It was Maya, thank God. At least now he had someone to talk to before she would be needed somewhere else in the club.

“How’d you know we talked?” Luke asked, turning a bit to face Maya and raising a brow.

She scoffed, leaning more comfortably against the couch. “You’re seriously gonna ask that? It’s not like the spotlight was on both of you earlier. It was hot and distracting, don’t get me wrong, I probably wouldn’t notice if I was simply a customer, but I’ve seen Michael perform too many times that I pick up the little details,” she explained. “So, what did you talk about?”

“Did he tell you the whole story too or he at least only did that for his best friend?”

“Ooo, someone’s mad,” she teased, patting Luke’s thigh gently. “I know bits and pieces but that’s only when I interrupted him and Calum talking. Don’t worry, he’s only really told Calum. They just talk about it so much that a lot of us overhear it.”

Luke was at a loss for words. Knowing Michael kept talking about him to Calum was admittedly overwhelming. He wanted to feel ecstatic about it but he held himself back.

“You got him good, kid,” Maya said after Luke continued to be silent. “He’s never been this hooked before.”

“I wanna take your word for it but I need to hear him say it himself,” he said, trying to take a quick look at the door to see if Michael was about to come back. “He said we’ll talk about it when he comes back.”

“I’ll leave you to it then,” she said, flashing him an encouraging smile. “Obviously for the two of you and for the sake of everyone around you, please make this work.”

Luke gave her a tight-lipped smile before she stood up and walked back to the club. After a few seconds, Michael came in and started to fish out the bills from his clothes as he walked towards where Luke was.

“A good round?” Luke asked, pointing at the bunched up bills that Michael threw on the couch.

Michael shrugged. “I could’ve done worse,” he said, tossing the last bill to the pile. “You certainly helped, though. Thanks for doing that.”

“What’s better than a lap dance for free in front of almost a hundred howling people?”

“Us settling what’s going on here,” Michael said, suddenly serious as he pointed between him and Luke.

Luke crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch, waiting for Michael to continue talking.

“What I did was a dick move,” he said, pushing the pile of money away so he could sit next to Luke. “I shouldn’t have said that, I could’ve at least phrased it better but my nerves overcame me. I’m not making excuses, I swear, I really am sorry.”

“What did you mean by it?”

“By what?”

“You’re not sure about that,” Luke said, mimicking the way Michael said it the other night.

“I’ve dealt with so many people before,” Michael started, laughing humorlessly. “They only see me as my job and assume I’m easy and always available because of my way of living. Most of them only wanted to get closer to me with having sex with me in mind. I used to --”

“And you thought I’d be one of those people?”

“I barely know you, Luke!” Michael said, trying to lower the volume of his voice since there were still some on his colleagues within earshot. “I was being cautious. What if you were planning on using me and I let it happen? What happens to me then? I don’t want to go through that again!”

“Hey, hey, I’m sorry,” Luke said, trying to hold onto Michael’s wrists. “Calm down, everyone’s gonna start looking at us.”

Michael pulled his hands away and ran both of it through his still damp hair. “I really do like you, if that isn’t obvious yet. I loved my lilac hair and now it’s this faded excuse of a blue just because of your eyes,” Michael mumbled, keeping his face out of Luke’s line of sight.

“It looks good on you, though.”

“Yeah, but it’s not the right shade of blue.”

Luke then chuckled with a shake of his head. “I wouldn’t have pegged you as a sap.”

The conversation felt easy all of a sudden and Luke would’ve wanted to be upset with Michael longer but he understood where Michael was coming from. He doesn’t know it first hand but he tried to get it. He’s aware of the stigma surrounding Michael’s life, hell he still believes in some of them, but he’s willing to change his outlook on things.

“I thought I’ve made that pretty obvious, but I see the confusion. I did take my clothes off for you the first night we met,” Michael joked and Luke’s glad the older boy’s worries don’t apply to him anymore.

Luke thought about asking Michael again since under the circumstances they were in, he’s more hopeful he won’t get rejected. Although he was still hesitant, he’s already put himself out there and Michael already knew that he means well. Shouldn’t it be his turn to be asked?

After a few moments of silence, Michael speaks up. “About your offer,” he starts and Luke couldn’t help but grin widely. “Does it still stand?”

“Unless you want it to sit down for you to give it a lap dance.”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”


	9. can i not like you for a while?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been so long and I apologize greatly for the wait. Thank you for being patient. Also special thanks to [outlawofideal](http://archiveofourown.org/users/outlawofideal) for reading this chapter over for me!

Ashton was certain that now that Calum had successfully helped his best friend, they would be back to spiteful words and empty threats. He wasn't embarrassed to admit that he was beyond disappointed that that was the harsh truth. After today, Calum will either return to glaring at him from the other side of the room or making sure to ignore Ashton's existence all together. Aside from his passing remarks here and there, of course.

The past two days were, admittedly, the most fun he ever had since he started working in Temptation. He also felt like he achieved a lot since he managed to track down a person and help a friend in those 48 hours. Calum had been a great ally too and he was interesting to work with. He then remembered what Michael told him on his first day and now he can’t deny that Calum’s a people person.

Ashton made sure to keep an eye out for the exit doors, being mindful of Luke's expression when he leaves the club. While he was watching Michael and Luke talk onstage, he felt kind of apprehensive about the outcome of their plan. It didn’t look negative but it didn’t exactly look positive either.

Relief washed over Ashton when Luke emerged from the backroom with a huge grin and a glint in his eyes. It was obvious from Luke’s expression that him and Michael were in good terms, possibly even better. Unfortunately for Ashton, that also meant the end of his temporary ceasefire with Calum.

“Partnership terminated?” was the first thing Calum said to Ashton after he'd gotten back from his last request. "Also, congrats on a mission accomplished," he added. With how Calum said it, Ashton thought that the younger boy was gonna raise his hand for a high five but, as expected, nothing.

Ashton nodded with a tight-lipped smile. "Yeah, partnership terminated," he said, trying his best not to look like how he felt. "It wouldn't have been successful if you didn't know what Michael was planning tonight."

"At least you thought of making sure it was Luke who'd be onstage. I forgot Michael’s such a stubborn piece of shit that he wouldn't have picked Luke even if the boy had neon signs pointing at him," Calum said and Ashton was close to grinning. He was so glad of the lighthearted conversation he was having with Calum.

"Teamwork." He nodded again, not being able to stop the corners of his lips from turning upwards anymore. "It isn't called a partnership for nothing.”

At that moment he felt so pathetic for wanting to burst out of happiness. He wasn't even sure why and now he had to figure out what he was feeling. He can’t wrap his mind around why he was suddenly so elated that there was a possibility of him and Calum actually getting along.

"Too bad we're terminating it. We could actually be a decent pair, Irwin," Calum joked, lightly punching Ashton's shoulder. "If only you weren't such an asshole."

And there goes Ashton's temporary bubble of bliss.

"If only you weren't such a dick either," Ashton responded with a scoff. He should've known it wasn't going to last and now they were back to where they stopped. He sighed before he saw Michael approach them from his peripheral vision. He turned to face the blue haired boy, pleased that his banter with Calum came to a stop.

"I guess I should blame the both of you for what happened?" Michael asked, but in contrast to his words, he was grinning. At least someone was having a good night.

Both Calum and Ashton focused their eyes elsewhere with their expressions trying too hard to look innocent. When Michael gave them a stern look, they both dropped the act and smirked at Michael. “Okay, you caught us,” Calum said nonchalantly. “What now? You needed the push. Or in this case, _shove_.”

"What were you even thinking? That could've gone so differently."

"Please, why are you even complaining? We saw Luke leave, drill hole, and he looked as delighted and happy as you do right now," Calum said. Ashton could hear the roll of the eyes from Calum's tone. "If we hadn't done something, you two would probably still be pining and moping right now." When Michael looked liked he was going to argue, Calum stopped him. “No, shut up, I’ve had enough of your whining.”

Michael raised his hands in mock surrender. "Alright, I should be thanking you. It was a win-win for me tonight and I couldn't have done it without you two meddling with my life." It still sounded playful so Ashton knew there was no real heat to Michael's words.

“You sound like a villain from Scooby Doo.” Calum groaned before walking past Michael. "I can't stand all the happy Michael vibes, I'm going to my last table. Bye," Calum said as he walked away from Ashton and Michael.

"How about you, Mr Grumpy, can you stand the happy Michael vibes?" Michael teased as he nudged Ashton. Ashton narrowed his eyes at Michael. What did he just call him?

"Grumpy?" Ashton asked, raising an eyebrow. He was far from being grumpy. Bummed, yes but not grumpy. “I’m not grumpy.”

Michael mirrored Ashton's actions then crossed his arms. "I feel like there’s something going on. Is there something you wanna talk about? I'm all ears, Irwie," Michael said, bumping his shoulder against Ashton's.

Ashton considered it, talking about his problem. What's setting him back was that he didn't even have any idea what his problem was. He knew it involved Calum, he just wasn’t sure what exactly about Calum it was centered on. Thinking about it further, maybe he would figure it out while talking to Michael. He just wasn't sure if Michael would take him seriously.

"I think there is?" Ashton said but it came out more like a question. All of a sudden, it came crashing down on him. He was internally panicking because no, absolutely not. He shouldn't feel that way about someone who constantly teased him. It felt so much like a schoolboy crush.

Shit.

There it was.

It's a crush. He has a _crush_ on Calum. Ashton can already feel himself going pale at the thought.

"You're not sure?"

It took a while for Ashton to get back into the conversation. It wasn’t everyday you realize you’ve grown to harbor feelings for someone who can’t even consider you a colleague. There was no use denying though, so he might as well start accepting it now. "It's about Calum?"

Michael's eyes widened and he visibly perked up at Ashton's statement. "Well you've definitely got my attention now. What about that asshat?"

"You call each other asshat a lot."

"Don't change the subject. What did Calum do now?" Michael asked. Ashton felt smaller under Michael's stare, it didn’t help that he was already a few inches shorter than him.

Ashton took a deep breath and turned to avoid Michael's gaze. "I don't hate Calum?"

"Stop asking me questions. I already know you don't hate him but really, what happened?"

When it felt like Ashton wasn't going to say anything next, Michael pulled him to the nearest seating area. He then sat beside Ashton on the couch, facing him with his legs crossed. "Now that we're comfortable, tell Mikey what's wrong," Michael said with a pat to Ashton's thigh.

"Calum resents me," Ashton said before he started gnawing on his bottom lip. "And lately I'm really bothered by it, I don't know. It's ridiculous, whatever."

"Come on, it's not just another 'whatever' if it’s bothering you."

With a sigh, Ashton turned to face Michael properly. "I don't _hate_ Calum," Ashton repeated, raising his eyebrows for Michael to grasp the fact that that wasn’t the extent of what he meant.

"I know that," Michael said, sounding exasperated. Ashton raised his brows again and waited for it. He managed to count up to twelve before Michael's eyes grew wider and his lips shaped into an O.

 _Oh_.

"Yeah," Ashton said, trying to sound as unconcerned as he can. It didn't work.

"You _like_ him," Michael confirmed. It sounded too foreign when he heard it from someone else, much more since he only realized it a few minutes ago. “Like not just as bros, right? Like you wanna kiss him and other stuff?” he added, followed by a suggestive smile.

Ashton would have chuckled at how middle school this conversation sounded but he couldn’t, he was too embarrassed at the moment and his cheeks were too flushed. “Yeah and," Ashton hesitated, "we kinda already did that.”

“Kinky hate sex?”

“Shit, no, we just kissed,” Ashton said and his hand sprung up, ready to cover Michael’s mouth. “And don’t talk so loud, people are still around," he said as he craned his neck to scout the area for prying ears.

Michael was silent for a while. His mouth was slightly agape but the corners of his lips were still turned upwards. "Wait." Michael paused then he swiftly turned to look back at Ashton, "when did that happen?"

"A few weeks ago, when he was practicing for his pole routine," Ashton responded. His flushed cheeks were still not fading.

Michael raised a brow, confused. "But you were late that day."

The redness reached Ashton's ears. He then started to explain how he ended up in the club during the morning and how it turned into him helping Calum out. As soon as the story neared the part where Calum started to dance for him, he trailed off. "Then I pretended to be a customer and he played along and then..."

"Holy fuck, you did have sex! And on the stage!"

"Can you stop saying that? We did not have sex, okay?"

"Not yet, at least," Michael said with a smirk. "No, go, continue the story," he added, gesturing for Ashton to start talking again.

"So I felt mesmerized while he was dancing --"

"What a fucking line."

"Shut up," Ashton whined, dragging the second word and lightly pushing the younger boy. "And I don't know what came over me. I just climbed the stage and kissed him against the pole then I found an excuse to flee." By the end of the story, Ashton had folded himself up even smaller.

Michael hummed as he nodded. By the look on his face, Ashton knew he was trying to digest all the information that was just presented to him. With another nod, he spoke again, "okay, but the question is: did he kiss you back?"

Not being able to trust his voice after his revealing tale, Ashton nodded. After that, there was a small smile ghosting on his features, lightly showing his dimples.

"Aw, look at you being all mushy. Didn't think you were one of those kinds of people," Michael teased, ruffling Ashton's hair before he was shoved away again.

"You're one to talk. You and Luke are probably beyond being mushy, you're on an even higher level."

"Oh, no, you don't get to redirect this somewhere else. No one cares about me and Luke right now," Michael said, and then he suddenly grew serious. "You need to tell Calum."

"What, so you can finally help him plan a murder?"

"He won't kill you."

"You don't know that."

"That's true."

“How reassuring.”

"But what I do know is that Calum is a complex person and I'm not gonna be _that_ friend who assumes I know him like the back of my hand, because I honestly don't," Michael started, smiling sympathetically at Ashton. "Although, from all the years I've known him, he's never acted this hostile against anyone. You must be special, then."

"Thanks," Ashton said, sounding sarcastic.

"Okay I get that you said 'thanks' but all I heard is: 'right, Michael, you're so amazing and we’re so lucky to have you as a friend. I should talk to him as soon as he gets back from his table'," Michael said, his eyes shifting to a moving figure by his side. "And look at that, just on time. Go get him, tiger," Michael said as he patted Ashton’s thigh again before he stood up and walked away from the scene.

Ashton followed Michael's retreating figure before he turned back and shifted to looking at Calum coming closer to him.

He knew Michael was right but it was more complicated than that. At least to him it seemed like it was. Calum's too hard to read and too unpredictable. He needed to gauge the consequences of his actions before choosing what to do. If he had no idea what could be in store for him, he wouldn't know what to choose.

"Where's Michael going?" Calum asked, sitting at a respectable distance from Ashton. Which, come to think of it, was pretty understandable but Ashton still deflated at the obvious space between them.

"Something to do with Luke, most likely," Ashton said, matched with a shrug. Though he knew Michael left in his favor and probably had no prior plans on what to do next. He felt lucky to have Michael as a friend.

"Let me guess, you talked about Luke the entire time I was gone," Calum started, followed by a light laugh. "Michael gets all rambly whenever he has an eye on someone."

Ashton considered lying or dodging the conversation altogether but that would just get him nowhere. He seriously doesn't want to turn into the pining type. "Not really and trust me, I'm surprised too."

"So you just sat here?"

"We talked, just not about Luke," he responded with a nod, smiling shakily.

Calum's brows furrowed then he raised his right one. "You were talking shit about me, weren't you?"

"Please, the world doesn't revolve around you, Hood."

"Your world does, though, right?" Calum teased and Ashton felt heat rushing to his cheeks again. 

"Is there ever a day you aren't cocky?"

"Like I've told you, Irwin, it's needed for the job. And in more ways than one, too." After he spoke, Calum winked.

"Did you just wink at me?"

"Possibly."

Taking a deep breath, he tried to plan what he wanted to say. He then shook his head, knowing he can't prolong it any longer. "Can we please address the elephant in the room?"

"No need to call me names," Calum joked, smiling at Ashton.

“Our kiss,” Ashton said bluntly, ignoring Calum’s comment. “That’s what Michael and I talked about,” he continued while absentmindedly playing with his fingers.

A few seconds passed before Calum said anything. “You told him that?!” he exclaimed as he stood up. His hands went through his hair as he kept muttering something under his breath. “Why in the world would you tell Michael that happened?”

“It wasn’t a secret.”

“It’s not something you just tell people, too!”

By then, Ashton was already standing up. “What was I supposed to do?”

“Shut up about it?” Calum said and Ashton looked around, growing aware that the sheer volume of their voices is already attracting people to look at them. Michael was probably behind him, already listening on. “Or you could’ve talked to me about it first? You run away every damn time we can get the opportunity!”

Instead of responding, Ashton took hold of Calum’s wrist and pulled him to the back door so they could talk outside without anyone overhearing.

As soon as they stepped foot outside of the club, Calum yanked his arm away from Ashton’s grip. “What? Did you bring me out here to surprise kiss me again?” Calum taunted. His breathing was heavy from shouting and struggling while Ashton was pulling him. “Because don’t you fucking dare pull that shit on me again,” he added, pointing a finger at Ashton.

The older of the two scoffed. “If I remember correctly, you kissed back,” Ashton said then he crossed his arms defensively. “You can’t blame that on me.”

Calum’s breath hitched and he took a few steps away from Ashton. “You can’t hold that against me!” was Calum’s response. “I… It’s kissing, who doesn’t like to be kissed? It was a natural response,” he added but Ashton noticed a change in Calum’s demeanor. Suddenly his anger towards the dark haired boy simmered and his mind was racing.

Ashton then pressed his hands against his temples, trying to recollect his thoughts. Too many thoughts are going through his head and he wasn’t mentally prepared to handle any of them that night. He started cursing under his breath as his hands continued to put pressure against his head.

“I, oh shit, did I make you feel uncomfortable when I kissed you? Fuck, I didn’t think of that sooner. Because if it did make you uncomfortable, holy shit, I am so sorry.” Ashton was rushing with his words then he started pacing in the back parking lot, not noticing Calum was walking towards him. “I don’t even usually do that. I don’t just pounce on people, that was uncalled for. God, I’m so mad at myself right now.”

He stopped his pacing when he felt hands on his shoulders. When he looked up, he was met with Calum’s soft features. The lamp post behind him brought out the golden hue of Calum’s eyes that weren’t looking at him threateningly for once.

“Hey, hey,” Calum said, his thumbs lightly tracing circles on Ashton’s neck. “It wasn’t like you attacked me, okay? I had a feeling it was gonna happen and if it made me uncomfortable, I would’ve pushed you away immediately.”

While Calum was talking, Ashton made it a point to avoid looking back and was determined to keep his eyes on the ground. “I’m still sorry,” Ashton murmured, barely audible.

“Nothing to be sorry for,” Calum replied as one of his hands went behind Ashton’s neck, pulling him closer until Ashton’s head met his shoulder. Ashton could feel Calum’s breath hit the side of his face and he closed his eyes to immerse himself in the feeling.

They stayed like that for a few seconds before Calum spoke again. “I am positive that I wouldn’t have kissed back if I was uncomfortable,” he whispered and Ashton swore he felt Calum ghost his lips against his hair. “Just thought you should know that, in case you’re still over-thinking.”

His response was a small nod, his forehead rubbing against Calum’s shoulder. Ashton could feel his heart beating faster as Calum started playing with the hair on his nape. He swore his heart swelled three times it’s usual size too as he realized Calum was actually being tender with him. Calum was actively showing him affection even with how much he claims he finds Ashton intolerable.

There was that happy bubble again. He knew that as soon as he speaks, it’s gonna pop and Calum would probably pretend the moment they were having never happened.

Ashton took a deep breath as he relished being surrounded by Calum’s warmth. Internally, he groaned. He can feel his transition into the pining type. So before Calum could even feel how fast Ashton’s heart was beating, he reluctantly pulled away.

“I really am sorry,” he said, taking a side step so he would be closer to the back door. “I think it would be better if I stayed away. This is affecting our work ethic way too much. Not to be dramatic, but it’s true,” he explained as he continued to inch closer to the door. "We'll talk about the kiss soon, just not right now that it's practically still fresh in our minds," he added with a small wave before he entered the club again. He faintly heard Calum calling him back but he convinced himself it was probably just his imagination.

He continued walking until he reached the lockers, ignoring everyone else’s curious stares. He even noticed some of them glancing between him and the back door. They’re probably wondering why Calum hasn’t come in yet. Ashton was curious too but he knew better than to think much of it. Calum probably wanted to stay outside longer or he was smoking. Either way, it doesn’t concern him any longer.

He passed by Michael and even if he wanted to, he knew he wouldn’t be able to avoid talking about whether he told Calum or not.

“Hey,” Michael started but he stopped talking as soon as Ashton started shaking his head.

“I didn’t,” Ashton said, straight to the point. “I couldn’t, it's just, yeah,” he added, grabbing his backpack from his locker. “It’s not important anyway, let’s leave it at that. See you tomorrow, Michael.”

Before there was a significant distance between them, Michael was able to grab a strap of Ashton’s backpack. “No, you can’t run away from this one.”

“Michael, let go,” Ashton whispered, pulling his bag closer to him. “It’s been too much for one night.”

“Ashton…”

“ _Soon_ , okay? I told him that too, that we'll talk soon,” Ashton said, pleading with his eyes. “I’m just done for tonight. I appreciate the help, I do. I promise I’ll work my shit out soon.”


	10. you take things so hard and then you fall apart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know I've been kind of off with updating this but I seriously do love this plot and fic and I am in no way going to abandon it. Sometimes it just takes a lil while for me to write because of having other things to deal with.
> 
> On to better news, I am hoping on either a weekly update schedule or at least once in 10 days because I wanna finish this fic (it's been over a year, pls) and I wanna start on this plot that has been on the works since last year.
> 
> Anyway, I do hope you enjoy this chapter!

“Let me try and understand what you’re saying,” Michael said, pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand while the other clutched what Calum just handed to him. “You got me pineapple flavored gum for my date?”

Calum nodded, clearly not understanding why Michael was reacting the way he was. “For someone who should be grateful, you’re awfully ungrateful right now,” Calum countered, leaning against the wall behind him.

Michael took the packet of gum and examined it for a while, trying to figure out why exactly he should be thankful to be handed such a thing. “I’d understand breath mints or at the very least _mint_ flavored gum but, seriously, pineapple?” Michael asked, taking a stick out for him to consume.

In contrast to Michael’s reaction to receiving the gum, he kept it in his pocket anyway.

“Don’t you read those silly articles and links people share on Facebook?” Calum asked, walking towards Michael’s bed and plopping himself on it.

“Do you honestly think I’m one of those people who’d waste time reading those things? I barely even go online anymore.”

“Okay, fair point.” Calum sighed in defeat as he took his phone out. “Wait, I’ll try to find the thing. I think I bookmarked it for some reason.”

“Know what, I’m not even gonna call you out for that. I should’ve known you’re one of _those_ people,” Michael said, turning around to look at himself in the mirror. He started fiddling with his hair, pulling his fringe closer to the side as if it would make a difference.

He heard his bed shift before feeling Calum next to him. “Can you stop messing with your hair? You’re starting to give me a complex,” Calum commented, pulling Michael’s wrist with his palm facing upwards. “Here, read the thing,” he added as he placed his phone on Michael’s hand, the article already open.

Michael took the phone with his other hand and scrolled through the article, already chuckling at the first sentence of it. “This is a long ass article, Cal. My attention span is too short for this.”

It took about four minutes for Michael to read through the entire thing, his eyebrows raising on certain parts. When he finished, he tossed the phone back to Calum, who has returned to Michael’s bed. “You’re an idiot, I can’t believe you made me read that,” Michael said as he shook his head while walking to his closet.

“I’m just looking out for you, man. I want you to enjoy getting laid, not all best friends would do that.”

“Okay one, never let me read another article like that ever again and two, the fucking article said they fed people _actual_ pineapples, not gum that tasted like pineapples,” Michael pointed out when he got back in his room. “It might not even work.”

“But doesn’t the possibility of your come tasting sweeter make you feel any better?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Michael exclaimed as he grabbed the nearest object to his right to throw towards his best friend. “We are not discussing this,” Michael said, turning around to hide his flushed face from Calum. “Why can’t you be a normal friend and be disgusted with even just the thought of talking about my sex life?”

Calum scoffed as he placed the bottle of lotion Michael threw on the bedside table. “I’m unconventional, that’s why you love me,” he said, pushing himself further into the bed until his back hit the headboard. “But back to the point, you should still be appreciative.”

“Yes, I should be _so_ grateful that you gave me pineapple flavored gum in hopes that the artificial flavoring in it will take effect like the real thing and if Luke sucks me off later tonight, I’m gonna taste sweeter,” Michael quipped, rolling his eyes as Calum only grinned at him. “Then okay, thank you,” he added but still with a hint of sarcasm.

“I could’ve gotten you a real pineapple, that would have been weirder,” Calum stated as he watched Michael move around his room to get everything ready before the date.

“You could’ve gotten me nothing and I would still consider you as a friend. But now I’m thinking that’s a thing of the past. I’m gonna go call Maya and tell her she’s my new best friend.”

Calum laughed bitterly as he threw one of Michael’s pillows at him, hitting him lightly in the back. “Oh fuck off, I know you appreciate the sentiment. You’re a sap like that, Mr Hopeless Romantic,” Calum teased, his smug expression clear in the mirror Michael was facing.

“Whatever,” Michael said with a scoff. “Okay then tell me this, why _didn’t_ you get me a real pineapple?”

Calum sat up straight as if he was ready to spit out some highly intellectual bullshit. Michael knew otherwise. “It would’ve been a lot messier. We’d have to cut it up and wait, did you know pineapples actually eat you back while you’re eating them?”

“Okay, how many of those pointless articles have you been reading?” Michael asked, grabbing the shirt he laid out earlier that day. “Seriously, you’re way too exposed to click baits on Facebook. Have you been spending all your free time online? Don’t tell me you’ve been stalking,” he teased, knowing his best friend all too well.

“Fuck you, that was uncalled for,” Calum said, fighting the urge to throw the pillow beside him again. “I don’t stalk online,” he said and Michael was about to say something before Calum cut him off. “And before you say it, I don’t stalk in person either. Why are you so persistent in wanting to mention him? Do I have to tell Maya you’re actually lying and Ashton’s your new best friend and not her?”

“Shut up.” After that, Michael chuckled, remembering his last conversation with Ashton. “If you only had any idea,” Michael muttered under his breath.

“Come again?” Calum asked, trying to shift a bit closer to Michael so he could hear him better.

Michael smirked, being given a perfect opportunity for payback. “Funny, that’s what I was planning on telling Luke later,” Michael teased, followed by laughter at Calum’s face of discomfort.

Calum raised his hands in defeat then he got up from the bed. “You’re right, discussing your sex life is _definitely_ disgusting. I can’t believe I was willing to subject myself to that torture just a few minutes ago.” When he reached the door, he turned back to Michael. “But honestly, have fun, man, I’m glad you can finally stop pining.”

Michael took a look at the digital clock on his bedside table as soon as he heard Calum shut his front door. The numbers 6:56 stared back at him when he realized he barely had more than an hour to prepare. A string of expletives came out of his mouth as he ran to the bathroom to finally get ready.

*

Michael spotted Luke already waiting in front of the restaurant when he turned the corner. He parked at the closest empty parking space, his laziness in walking getting the best of him. After getting out of his car and locking it, he couldn’t help the grin he got while he was walking towards the blond and already feeling Luke’s eyes on him.

“You’re late,” was the first thing Luke commented on as soon as Michael was close enough.

“By what? 6 minutes?” he said, taking a quick look at his wrist watch. The weight of the gum packet in his pocket became noticeable as Michael kept on walking closer to Luke. “Calum came over to give me something, it was ridiculous. Can’t believe I’m still friends with that guy” he explained, patting his pocket just for the hell of it.

“He seems like a cool guy, give him some credit. He’s probably just looking out for you,” Luke said, tentatively hooking his arm around Michael’s. “He just wants what’s best for you.”

Michael rolled his eyes but still grabbed Luke’s arm with his other hand. “Try being friends with him for 13 years, you’ll think otherwise,” he joked.

As he took his eyes off of his and Luke’s interlocked arms, he took the opportunity to examine the restaurant. When Luke had texted him the place, he immediately recognized the street as being on the better side of town.

“This place looks fancy,” he couldn’t help but comment.

Luke scoffed but Michael noticed it was a bit shaky, like the other boy was nervous. At least he’s assured that they both are. “It’s not _that_ fancy,” he countered, sounding sheepish. “Okay, can I be honest?”

“Hopefully you will be the entire night,” Michael said, not really thinking about his phrasing. He’s been trying to push away his concerns for the night, even if he knew it was inevitable for something to go wrong. It always does whenever it concerns him. It was an awful thought.

The blond just laughed off Michael’s statement, hopefully not getting what Michael really meant by his words. “I just Googled this place last night. I was gonna take you to my favorite diner but realized that should be a second date kind of place.”

Michael hummed, unconsciously leaning into Luke. “Sounds promising. But will there actually be a second date?” Of course despite his teasing tone, Michael was hoping the answer was in the affirmative side. If banter was already this easy with Luke on the entry to their first date, he can already imagine how easy it would be to talk during the date proper.

“We’ll have to wait and see,” Luke said and before Michael could reply, Luke had called the attention of the hostess. “Reservation under Hemmings,” he said and Michael couldn’t help but admire the air of confidence Luke had at that moment.

The hostess was quick enough to locate the name on the list and smiled at both of them before leading the way. “Ah yes sir, right this way,” the hostess said and Michael and Luke followed right after.

As they were walking to their table, Michael leaned in close to Luke’s ear. “You must really want a second date if you went as far as calling in a reservation,” he teased, lightly biting Luke’s earlobe. “It’s working, though.”

They were given menus as soon as they sat down and as Michael studied Luke on the other side of the table, he could tell something’s bothering him as he looked through the list of food.

“What’s wrong?” Michael asked, reaching out to lightly touch Luke’s hand. “Did you just realize escargot is actually snail?” he added as a joke, bringing his menu down to properly look at Luke. The younger man looked troubled, possibly worried about something. The sudden change of mood gave Michael an uneasy feeling.

Luke slowly looked at Michael, biting his lip as he closed his menu. “How embarrassing would it be if I said I didn’t think this place would be as expensive as it actually is?” Luke asked, pushing the menu away. He had started rubbing the back of his neck, possibly one of his nervous quirks.

It would be weird to say that Michael had expected it but Luke definitely didn’t look like someone who could actually afford a full-course meal for two in a restaurant they were in. Michael nodded in understanding, it was the least he could do. The thought that Luke had bothered taking him to this place was enough to get him in his pants anyway.

“It’s cool,” Michael said, reopening his menu to look through it quickly. “Any kind of pasta will do for me the whole night and I’d have no problem with that. Honest,” he added, giving Luke a gentle smile.

The look of relief that washed over Luke’s face was something Michael would file under faces he’d think about whether he wanted to see again. The way the younger man looked was something to be remembered but what caused it was something to be forgotten.

Michael inwardly groaned at the thought. _No_. He shook his head, convincing himself that he wasn’t that whipped. Yet.

“Are you sure?” Luke asked and Michael expected that. Something told Michael that Luke simply was a people pleaser. It was evident in his actions. “It’s kind of a bummer you’d have to settle for something I can cook for you instead.”

“Then what are we still doing here if you’re bragging about your cooking skills?” asked Michael, jokingly pushing his chair away from the table to stand up.

Luke quickly grabbed his wrists and pulled him back. “No, no, no,” he started, frantically looking around while still pulling Michael. “It’s already embarrassing I can’t afford a full force date here, much more if we just leave when I actually made a reservation,” he said, biting his bottom lip.

Michael understood Luke’s concern although it wasn’t practically rational in Michael’s opinion. He’d definitely rather have Luke cook him a dinner he can afford rather than eat something overpriced in a restaurant possibly full of elitist snobs.

“We could split the bill,” Michael suggested but he knew Luke would convince him that it wasn’t necessary.

Luke quickly shook his head. “I asked you out so I should pay,” he said but Michael couldn’t understand his reasoning. As if reading his mind, Luke explained further. “It’s like a rule I made for myself. If I ask, I’ll pay and I’d just hope the person I’m on a date with thinks the same way. You know, so it wouldn’t just be the same person paying for the dates all the time. Does that make sense?”

It does make sense and Michael knew all too well about the importance of following the rules he’d made for himself. It was a good rule, maybe he’ll be the one to ask Luke for their next date. “If you insist,” replied Michael. “But really, I’m all up for chipping in.”

After a few more minutes of arguing, they finally settled on ordering and staying on the cheaper part of the menu.

“Are you sure this is okay for you?” Luke asked, just like he did about ten times before.

Michael chuckled as he nodded. “Yes, Luke, I’m 100% positive I’m okay with what we ordered. Please calm down,” Michael reassured him, reaching out again to caress Luke’s knuckles.

“I’m just,” Luke started, tentatively pulling his hand away from Michael’s. “This isn’t the first date I imagined for us to be having.”

That piqued Michael’s interest. If dinner wasn’t Luke’s first thought, he’d want to hear how the decision came to be. “Well okay then,” Michael said, entwining his hands and placing them on the table. “How did you think our first date would go?”

“I don’t know,” Luke said, fumbling with the napkin on his lap. “At first I thought of a movie date but then that’d be too cliché and it would be a horrible way to get to know you. You know, with all your attention on the movie,” he explained shyly.

Michael could see Luke’s point. He thought they would go and see a movie too. At least one of them knew what was important. “Good point,” Michael said with a nod. “And I’d rather have fettuccine than greasy popcorn any day.”

“See? We’re already starting to get to know each other,” Luke said proudly.

“Okay, back to your imagined first date.”

Luke raised an eyebrow as a side of his lip quirked up. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“Of course I am. Fuels my ego you thought a lot about where to take me out.”

“Shut up,” Luke muttered. “Then okay I thought we could go to the park. It was a good idea at first and it was kinda cute, you know?”

Michael could feel his fond stare as Luke kept rambling on. It wasn’t even because of Luke taking the time to think about their date that made him look at him that way but it was Luke altogether. Michael still can’t grasp the fact he’d been in luck that Luke wanted to go on a date with him.

“...so I was like ‘what if he wasn’t the kind of person who liked nature?’ then I scraped that idea immediately,” was what Michael heard when he listened back to Luke’s explanation.

Judging by what he heard, he didn’t miss much from his explanation which was lucky for him. He didn’t want to be caught that he was too distracted by Luke to actually listen to him. “Well, you get bonus points for throwing that idea away. Walking plus nature is okay in theory but maybe when you’re only with dogs or kids,” Michael said. “Maybe not even then,” he added then slightly nodding to indicate for Luke to continue.

Luke groaned as he covered his face. “This is getting embarrassing,” he muttered, taking a peek at Michael between his fingers. “When is that food coming,” he added, raising his head up to look for their server, wherever they might have been.

It was endearing to watch Luke being all flustered and trying to avoid the topic. Michael would’ve been merciful and told him he need not to tell his decision making process but it was just a sight to watch. “Come on,” he urged. “What did you think after the park?”

“You won’t let this go, would you?” Michael shook his head. “I think I contemplated calling either of my brothers for advice but then of course they’ll ask who I’d be going on a date with and then they won’t be much help. They’ll just be cooing about how much my balls finally grew,” Luke explained, followed by laughter at his brothers’ predictable attitude.

Michael’s smile just coaxed Luke to finally finish his story. “Then I think I fell asleep on the couch then I woke up and did the first thing I thought of. Dinner would be the best option but I couldn’t take you to my favorite dinner yet. Then like I said, I Googled this place then called without further thought. Now look where that got us,” he finished and Michael could still hear the hint of distress that they had to budget their dinner.

“It got us to talking,” Michael encouraged, always wanting others to feel comfortable and accepted in his presence. “I got to know your thinking process,” he added.

As much as Luke tried to conceal his smile from Michael, it didn’t go unnoticed.

The short silence fell over them was cut short by their food finally arriving.

As they started eating, the growing feeling of other people’s eyes on him were making him uncomfortable. His first thought was that no one would recognize who he was there. It wasn’t like any of these people would be caught dead in the dim lights of Temptation.

He tried pushing the feeling away but it kept growing as they continued to eat. And as if to prove him wrong, when he looked up, he saw someone from a distance that was looking right at him. Michael stared right back, always up for staring contests with strangers. What surprised him though was the smirk the person had. To add to it, he was gesturing towards Michael, like he wanted to convey something. His heart sank as he realized what the person was trying to achieve and it confirmed he’d been one of the customers in the club.

Right, okay, he remembered why it had been a bother to go on dates. While it was rare, being recognized in public so crudely made him uncomfortable. At least he was glad Luke was too preoccupied with his food to notice what went on with Michael. Too bad that didn’t stop the brewing negative thoughts in his head.

To distract his overthinking, he decided to cut the silence between him and the other man but he didn’t think much of what he said. “Did you know I haven’t been on a date in over a year?”

Once that was out in the open, Michael had expected a scoff or a chuckle. He didn’t expect Luke almost choking on his current bite.

“Be careful now,” Michael teased.

Luke took quick gulps of his water before his eyes fell back on Michael, looking full of disbelief. “Over a year?”

“You sound surprised.”

That’s when Luke scoffed. “Shouldn’t I be?” he asked, taking the napkin to wipe the remnant of the water around his lips.

“I think you’re forgetting who you’re on a date with,” Michael said, his tone starting to sound flat and distant. He noticed it immediately and as much as he wanted to prevent it from going all out, he already couldn’t help himself. He wanted to throw a piece of bread to the person from across the restaurant.

Luke scoffed again. “I’m on a date with this handsome man that I couldn’t take my eyes off while he was onstage. A man who managed to outshine their star performer in my eyes as he mentioned it himself. A man who, by the few proper conversation we’ve had, seems to be a perfect catch,” Luke commented, not taking any of Michael’s bullshit. Already in his current mindset, none of Luke said actually stuck to Michael’s head.

“Yeah,” Michael said with a roll of his eyes. “A man you watched on stage in a _strip club_.”

Again, Luke just stared at Michael in disbelief. “That sounds like something a man would say who despised his job,” Luke managed to comment and Michael wanted to laugh at his face and maybe punch himself in the face at the same time. He could already feel this date was going to fail.

“I’m not ashamed of what I do,” Michael defended, pushing away his plate then he crossed his arms. “Never have been.”

“Then what was that supposed to mean?” Luke was starting to get defensive too but Michael was too far gone to try and appease himself and Luke at the same time. At that point, all he wanted was to prove Luke wrong.

“Other people always are,” Michael explained, raising his eyebrow like he was challenging Luke.

Luke leaned against the chair’s backrest as he stared Michael down. “Didn’t we just go over this?” Luke asked, his face scrunched. “I don’t give a shit that you take your clothes off for a living.”

It was Michael’s turn to scoff. “Yeah, for now,” he spat, his tone getting nastier as their conversation continued.

“Okay, now what’s _that_ supposed to mean?” Luke asked, his voice starting to gain volume and his hands gripped the end of the table.

“Think of it this way,” Michael started, uncrossing his arms to accurately gesture his explanation. “We hit it off then a few months in, I would have to meet your parents,” he said, raising his left hand. “Or you’d never want to see me again,” he added, now raising his right hand. “In either of those cases, you’d have to tell someone that I’m a stripper,” Michael explained.

It was evident in Luke’s expression that he couldn’t understand what Michael’s point was. “And so?” he asked, pushing Michael to elaborate further.

“Can you handle the judgment? Can you handle the thought that you’re going to be that _someone_ who ‘thought they could tie down a stripper with no class’? Huh, can you?” Michael said, knowing it would provoke a negative reaction from the younger man.

“Is that what you think of yourself?” Luke asked and Michael was surprised at Luke’s tone. He expected it to be as daring as his was or possibly angry but Luke’s tone was soft, almost pitying. Michael hated that.

“Aren’t you listening, Luke?” Michael asked, already pushing himself away from the table. “I love what I do. _Other people_ don’t.”

“Why do you care so much about other people?”

Michael wanted to groan in frustration but tried to suppress it, he’d already shown Luke too much hostility. “Imagine the meeting the parents scene,” he started, lifting his left hand again. “What are you gonna say? ‘Hey, this is Michael, the guy I’m dating. He’s the stripper at the club my brothers took me to on my birthday. Isn’t that such a romantic story?’” Michael said, using an annoying voice to portray Luke. “Ah yes, parents just love hearing that,” he added, voice laced with sarcasm.

“You don’t know my parents,” was Luke’s futile attempt at a defense.

“I know _people_ and from where I’ve been standing for the past couple of years, my kind of people aren’t exactly a perfect fit for you ‘normal’ folk,” Michael said and when he heard what he said, he couldn’t even believe it anymore. The frustration had taken over him and if he could control the situation, he’d never want to release any of this anger on Luke of all people.

Luke was starting to breathe deeply, the anger looking like it’s finally catching up with him. “Well I guess you won’t get to know my parents then. Thanks for choosing the second case yourself,” Luke said, pushing himself away from the table as well. He took his wallet from his pocket and slammed the few dollars he had estimated their meal to be.

As he watched Luke, Michael simply shook his head and stood up. “Thanks for the date. Sorry for the waste of time,” he muttered, suddenly feeling the item in his pocket again. He wanted to laugh bitterly at the promise it held but now that was obviously a distant thing for Michael’s imagination. “Come on, let’s take you home.”

“I can take care of myself, I’m taking a cab.”

Michael closed his eyes and tried to calm himself before speaking again. “Don’t be an idiot, just come on. I’ll drive you home. We strippers do have manners, just wanted you to know.”

Luke finally audibly groaned as he pocketed his wallet. “You’re such a piece of work,” Luke said, already starting to take steps away from Michael. “Get on your car alone. I’m leaving. Bye.”

It took a lot of energy for Michael to call Luke back but even then it still only came out as a whisper.

All Michael could do at that moment was watch Luke walk out the door.

*

“So how did --”

Calum’s question died in his throat as Michael tossed him something. Upon inspection, Calum noticed it was the gum packet he gave Michael the day before. A closer inspection proved that it was still only one less from a full pack.

“Take a wild guess,” Michael muttered, throwing his backpack in his locker before he messed with his clothes rack. “Should’ve seen it coming, really.”

Calum was stunned, Michael deciphered his expression. “I don’t understand,” was all Calum could say as he scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. “Thought it’d go well.”

“Did you really?” Michael spat, barely containing a scoff. “When has a date that involved me ever went well?”

It seemed to have come to Calum what went on during the date. Michael and his love life and fears have just been predictable over the years they’ve known each other. “You know not everyone thinks low of strippers, right?” Calum said as he stood up to walk over to Michael.

“I know,” Michael whispered, sounding defeated. “I just remembered last time and I don’t want that to happen again.”

“It won’t,” Calum said even though he didn’t know if it would. He decided it’s better for Michael to hear what he needed to hear. “Luke doesn’t look like that kind of guy.”

“No one is.”

Calum wrapped an arm around Michael’s shoulder and pulled him closer. “Yeah but I approve of him. I didn’t with the last one.”

“What, do you think you have the power to call that kind of shit now?” Michael joked, resting the side of his head on Calum’s shoulder. “I messed up, didn’t I?”

Michael felt Calum rest his head on his. “Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you can’t fix it.”

“He told me that was my last chance.”

Calum chuckled before gently nudging him with his shoulder. “Do you actually think he meant that?”

“He might have!” Michael exclaimed, almost pulling away from Calum’s shoulder if it wasn’t for Calum’s tight grip on him. “I did overreact about it,” he added, keeping his voice down to a whisper.

Calum’s fingers against Michael’s back soothed him as he felt Calum nodding. “You know, he’d probably understand if you explained.”

“As if. If he knew, the more he’d never want to do anything with me,” Michael responded, already expecting reactions he wasn’t sure of once again.

“You might be surprised.”

Michael was about to respond before he had spotted Maya walking in. What caught his attention was the paper in her hands. It looked like a letter that was folded into three. It must’ve been something official. His response for Calum was long forgotten as he walked towards their handler.

“Looks serious,” he quipped, trying to read quickly over Maya’s shoulder as he sneaked up behind her.

“It is,” Maya said and she sounded sad and confused. The impending feeling of a bad news was already building up in Michael.

“In this club, how could anything be serious?” Calum asked, stepping just beside Michael. He appreciated Calum’s attempt at a joke but it still seemed a bit too serious.

Maya looked at both of them with sad eyes. “Ashton filed for an indefinite leave.”


	11. set a fire in my head tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> If you've noticed, I finally have a definite number of chapters for this fic! Woo! While I was away (and failed to accomplish my plan to update weekly), I got to finalize my outline and it also included an update schedule.
> 
> I won't bore anyone with the details on my whereabouts but the main gist of it is that academics and organizations took most of my time and just a few days ago, I moved to a new place.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this new chapter!
> 
> (Even if it isn't the 7th here anymore, it's still the 7th somewhere in the world as I update this so. Happy birthday, Ashton!)

Calum was utterly confused on what he was feeling. He should feel happy, mostly. Maybe even a little bit ecstatic. He wasn’t feeling any of those, though.

With the announcement of Ashton’s leave of absence, the reigns are in his possession once again. He’s back as the sole star of Temptation. Ever since Ashton started stealing his thunder, it’s what he had been wishing for. For some odd reason, he can’t seem to make himself feel anything positive.

After Maya had told the news to him and Michael, he had no idea how to react. He was stunned at first, not expecting the news laid out. Calum knew he should have seen it coming, at least. He should’ve expected it with the way Ashton was acting the last time they spoke. It was apparent that Ashton wasn’t dealing with things up to par.

Although above all else, the most prominent feeling he had was confusion. Had he contributed to Ashton’s decision or was it a long time coming?

“Did he say why?”

The second he heard the question, he wanted to backhand Michael’s forearm for asking. It was an inappropriate question at that moment and he had no right to ask that. But before he could raise his hand, he realized Maya and Michael’s eyes were on him.

He was the one who asked the question.

Once the realization dawned on him, he expected a teasing remark from Michael but all he got was a solemn shake of the head from Maya.

“I can’t tell you that,” she said, closing the letter and keeping it amongst the other files in her clipboard. “Letters like this, they’re confidential,” she added. “As much as I want to tell you, I’m bound by a contract.”

It wasn’t the answer Calum wanted to hear. It wasn’t even close to an answer that can be called sufficient for anyone asking the same question. If his subconscious wanted to have an answer, damn it, he was going to get one.

“Does it have anything to do with me?” he asked. It was another stupid question and he should’ve thought more about it before opening his mouth.

What happened between him and Ashton at the back of the club remained unspoken after it occurred. All the others knew was that they talked. Aside from the kiss, even Michael wasn’t aware of anything that happened.

Michael quirked a brow when he completely faced Calum. “And why would you have anything to do with it?” he asked, crossing his arms.

It was a valid question. They weren’t kids in school. His relentless teasing and remarks wouldn’t have been enough to push Ashton to file a leave, much more an _indefinite_ leave.

Calum was left stunned as he tried to come up with an answer. He started to open his mouth but closed it again for a lack of a good response.

Just like he dreaded, Michael had a follow-up question before he could properly answer the first one. “What happened when you two talked?”

Maya instantly perked at the opportunity of new information. She isn’t exactly one for gossip. Technically, it’s part of her job to know these things, being their handler and all. Part of Calum wanted to tell her everything in hopes that she might be able to give him a sense of clarity but he knew better than to burden her with his problems.

Michael sighed when Calum continued to remain silent. “Ashton was in a rush to leave,” said Michael and Calum wasn’t aware of that. Ashton left him with a promise of talking soon and he had seemed calm enough back then. “He said you two would talk soon. Calum, what happened?”

Calum’s thoughts were racing and his heart was thumping louder than his thoughts were. He couldn’t figure out what he wanted to focus on. Everything was all over the place and all he wanted was silence. More importantly, he just wanted to know what happened to Ashton.

All he wanted was to escape. Leave the room and not have to deal with Michael and Maya’s questioning expressions. As much as he wanted to go through with that, he knew he shouldn’t. The people in front of him deserve at least a bit more information that what they already have.

“Ashton and I,” Calum started, before taking a deep breath, “we don’t get along.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Michael muttered and Calum was thankful for Maya gently elbowing his best friend.

It wasn’t the best statement to start with and he knew that. It was already common knowledge in almost the entire club that they wouldn’t be each other’s first choice for bro dates but Calum didn’t know what else to say.

“My, uhm, attitude,” he said, going with the first thought he came up with. “Towards him, when we first met him, it was uncalled for,” he continued, lazily pointing at Michael before he directed his gaze to the floor. “I just --”

“Felt threatened?” Michael supplied for him. He remembered Michael making that assumption weeks ago.

Calum tried to recall when they first met Ashton and how he felt back then. “No,” he said with a shake of his head. “Not at that moment, at least. I was just pissed off at how he was acting.”

“Then what happened?” Michael asked. “

“Remember his first performance? When Gene was like, bragging about being right about him? I just, I don’t know, it felt like I was gonna lose something.”

“Lose what?” Maya asked.

“ _Something_ , I don’t know,” Calum said with a shrug, slowly being drained of his energy. His shoulders slumped forward as he took deep breaths.

He felt a comforting hand rubbing his back and he didn’t bother caring if it was Michael’s or Maya’s hand, he was just glad the simple gesture was calming him a bit faster.

“Did you think you’d lose your job?” It was Maya who asked the question. “Because I’m telling you right now that you aren’t. Gene would be the biggest idiot in the world to ever think of cutting you loose. You’re one of our biggest talents, business will suck without you here.”

It was a nice sentiment to hear, but hearing it at that moment didn’t do anything to help him. He shook his head with a small smile on his lips. “It sounds cocky but I know I wouldn’t get fired. I wasn’t worried about that,” he said, his gaze still set on the ground.

It was the truth, what he had just said. While Ashton was gaining a lot of people’s interest, he continued to be highly requested every night and his regulars didn’t falter. To top it off, Gene never took him off the special performances section and he had lost count at how many 18th birthdays and bachelorette parties he’d been called to in the past few weeks. His job remained stable but he was still sure he was about to lose something. Not knowing what it was bothered Calum to no end.

There was a silence that fell between the three of them, not knowing how to pick up the conversation. Maya and Michael looked as if they were thinking of what to say next while Calum just wanted to leave and take the night off. He already had half a mind in doing so.

Seeming to read his mind, Michael piped up. “You can’t leave tonight.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Calum countered immediately, hating how Michael knew his antics.

“Yes, you were,” Michael said, followed by a sigh. “Look, as much as you deny it, I know what’s going through your head right now. And I want you to do that but you can’t.”

Calum shrugged. “I know.”

Maya gave him an apologetic smile and placed a hand on his shoulder. “You’re already here, might as well just make the most of it,” she said before leaving him and Michael alone.

As soon as Maya was out of hearing range, Michael pulled Calum closer and gripped his forearm tight. “Dude, seriously, were you even thinking of telling me what the fuck happened that night?” he asked, just enough for Calum to hear. It wasn’t difficult to achieve since Calum was just six inches away from him.

“Can I sleep at your place tonight? Don’t exactly feel like going home,” Calum asked, deciding to dodge Michael’s question. He didn’t actually feel like having a heart to heart with Michael in the middle of the backroom before the club opens. He just hoped that message was clear to Michael.

The moment Michael gave him a nod, he retracted his arm from the older man’s grasp and walked off.

He was determined to give his best performance yet. If he wasn’t going home then he’ll give the audience a night they wouldn’t forget. Besides, he was going to compensate for Ashton’s absence as well.

*

Calum was thankful his and Michael’s walk home was quiet. He knew Michael hated prolonged silences and he was grateful for his best friend giving his feelings some consideration. After a few more minutes of silence, he decided to consider Michael’s feeling in return.

As he looked over at Michael beside him, he expected him to look calm or at least indifferent but the blue haired man looked troubled and stuck in his thoughts.

“You’re doing that thing again,” Calum said as he nudged Michael with his elbow. “By the way, you look constipated,” he added, knowing he and Michael needed a lighter atmosphere.

Michael chuckled and shook his head. “What thing? I wasn’t doing a thing,” Michael defended, but Calum can see him trying to straighten his expression.

“Lying to me is useless, you know.” Calum sighed. He had a feeling Michael was beating himself up about what happened between him and Luke again. He wanted so badly to assure Michael that it was going to be okay but he had no idea what was going to happen. All he could do, really, was drape his arm across Michael’s shoulders.

When he pulled Michael close, he felt Michael immediately lean against his side. “It’s nothing,” Michael muttered.

“We both know it’s not.”

“Well tonight, it is,” Michael said, his tone not wanting Calum to argue with him. “Tonight, we’re focusing on your shit, alright? My drama can wait another night.”

“If you say so.”

Disentangling himself from Calum, Michael started skipping down the street. “You were different onstage a while ago,” Michael commented, jumping over the cracks on the sidewalk.

“I knew you were my biggest fan,” Calum joked as he chuckled at his best friend’s behavior. He admired how Michael can shift his feelings in a snap when he needed to. As Calum thought about it further, it was probably because he had mastered the art of it already. Suddenly, it made Calum feel uneasy. Michael didn’t deserve to have to deal with all of that even before turning 21.

Michael turned to face him and stuck his tongue out. “I’m just saying, there was something in your performance. I can’t tell if it’s a good thing or not.”

“But it was a good set, right?”

With a groan, Michael stopped walking and placed his hands on his hips. “You’re concerned about the wrong things, Cal.”

“Just, answer my question, please?” Calum said even though he knew Michael was right. Whether or not his performance was satisfactory wouldn’t help their situation in any way. Calum mostly wanted to know just to guarantee himself he was able to do something right.

With an exasperated sigh, Michael nodded. “Yeah, whatever, it was your best.”

“You’re not just saying that, right?”

“For fucks sake, Calum, that’s not even remotely important,” Michael exclaimed, suddenly walking fast towards his apartment complex. Calum was left on his own for a while, staring off in the direction where Michael went. He sighed before sprinting to catch up to Michael.

“I wanted to make up for Ashton not being there,” Calum said as soon as he opened the door and luckily Michael was sat on his couch and didn’t directly go to his room to change.

Michael made a noise of affirmation, reaching forward to grab the remote on the coffee table. “Good for you,” Michael muttered before turning the TV on.

He closed the door softly behind him, defeated. “Guess I deserved that,” Calum whispered, hanging his head low.

Completely drained of whatever fight he had left in his body, he went straight to the bathroom to start getting ready for bed. Washing his face woke him up a little and as he studied himself in the mirror, he got to fully see how exhausted he looked. His eyes were a clear indicator of how tired he was and his posture wasn’t helping in his appearance.

When he finished, he went back to the living room and saw Michael had changed his clothes and was trying to busy himself with looking for a channel to watch.

“I’m sorry,” Calum said immediately as he sat down. “You were just trying to help. I don’t deserve a friend like you.”

Michael turned the volume down and tossed the remote between the two of them. “Shut up, idiot, yes you do,” Michael said with a pointed look. “I just don’t understand why you don’t want to talk about it. It’s obviously bothering you a lot.”

Calum shrugged. “I guess talking about it just makes it more real. I’m scared what that would actually mean.”

Michael reached over to pat Calum’s thigh. “Hate to break it to you, pal, but it’s already real so whether we talk about it or not won’t change that,” he said, a hint of teasing in his voice. “But believe me, talking about it will help you understand even just a little of what’s going on with you.”

The younger man nodded in understanding but even if he wanted to talk about it, he had no idea where to start. “I don’t know where to begin,” he said with a laugh, but it was lacking any sign of humor.

“He told me, by the way,” Michael said, leaning back against the armrest of the couch. “About the kiss, just in case you didn’t know yet,” he added for clarification.

“Yeah, he mentioned that he told you about it,” was Calum’s answer. “I got more frustrated with him about that, actually.”

Michael pursed his lips as he moved his eyes around, seeming to be thinking about something. “Start with that then.”

“With what?”

If Calum wasn’t seated directly in front of Michael, he would’ve missed the small grin Michael had. “The kiss,” said Michael.

Calum groaned as he leaned his head back until it hit the back of the couch. “You just told me Ashton already told you about it. Why would you want to hear it again?”

“Yeah, he already told me but I wanna hear your side of the story.”

Knowing he couldn’t keep dodging the topic any further, Calum took a deep breath before talking. “You already knew about me wanting to practice earlier, right? You asked me about it the night before.” Without waiting for an affirmation from Michael, he continued talking. “While practicing, I just kept messing up. I couldn’t even get past the intro without losing count or missing my position. It was frustrating and I just wanted to give up. I couldn’t, though. I needed to prove myself.”

“Where does Ashton appear in this?”

“I was getting to that,” Calum retorted, rolling his eyes before continuing his explanation. “As I was saying, I was complete shit at my own routine so I took a break. Out of nowhere, Ashton comes out from the backroom and says I’m too stiff to work the damn pole.”

Michael gave a small nod and before Calum could continue talking, he spoke up. “You don’t have to prove yourself, by the way. Not to Ashton or Gene. Not to anyone. Remember that, okay?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“No, tell me you’re going to remember that.”

“Yes, alright, I’ll keep that in mind,” Calum said, the corners of his lips almost tugging up for a smile. “Can I get back to the story or are you gonna say something else?”

“You may proceed.”

Calum scoffed but repositioned himself to feel more comfortable. “So he comes in, yeah? Apparently, he was out jogging and saw that the back door was open. Guess it comes back to being my fault for not closing the door. Then we argued for a while until he ‘helps’ me to work the pole,” Calum said, adding the air quotes for emphasis. “Then he goes ahead and tells me to take off my shirt.”

“He told me you didn’t fuck onstage!”

Calum’s eyes grew wide as his mouth fell open. “We didn’t!”

“Sure,” Michael said with a wink, followed by a light laugh.

“I’m gonna pretend that part of the conversation didn’t happen,” Calum declared as he shoved Michael away. “Anyway! He left me alone to practice by myself while he went to edit the song. And I don’t know, we got to exchanging some teasing remarks until he pretended to be a customer. And yeah, you know what happened next.”

Michael crossed his arms and huffed like a child. “I said I wanted to hear your side of the story,” the older man said, followed by a pout.

“Ugh, fine and stop pouting, you’re a grown man for crying out loud.” Calum groaned. “I turned around and there he was, on the stage with me. I kinda already had a feeling about what was gonna happen next and before I could do anything else I was already pressed against the pole and we were kissing.”

“And then?”

Calum tried to remember exactly how it went down but he couldn’t remember and he couldn’t even understand what was going through his head during that time. “I don’t know.”

“He said something about him making an excuse to leave.”

Calum nodded. “Yeah, some kids decided to be dicks and threw a rock in one of the small windows. He said he was gonna check on it and that he was looking forward to watching my performance. Then he left.”

The conversation stopped there for a while. Michael was trying to comprehend the details he was just told and Calum was recovering from retelling the story.

It was Michael who spoke first. “What did you feel, during the kiss?” he asked.

“Huh?” Calum responded immediately. He wasn’t prepared for Michael to ask him that question. The last time he wanted to figure out what he was feeling, his thoughts bordered onto dangerous territory. He seriously isn’t ready to start thinking about that while he was talking to Michael. “I mean, what do people normally feel after being kissed?”

Michael smirked as he shook his head. “I haven’t been kissed in a long time, please tell me what it feels like again?” he teased like he knew exactly what Calum was trying to avoid.

“Alright, fine, I liked it, okay?” Calum answered before he even had the chance to think through his response.

“What?” Michael asked, obviously not expecting what he had heard.

Calum reached up to pull his hair, feeling frustrated in more ways that one. “I’m so fucked,” he muttered.

“I think you mean you’re gonna be so fucked,” Michael whispered but Calum still heard it.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” the raven-haired man asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Michael shook his head with a shrug of his shoulders. “I didn’t say anything,” he said, sticking his tongue out. “Can we just clarify this for a while? What exactly do you feel about Ashton right now?” he asked, suddenly with a serious expression.

Calum closed his eyes and leaned forward until his forehead was resting against his knees. “I don’t know,” he said, his tone sounding just like defeat. He felt such a hypocrite since he had given Ashton shit about giving him the same answer but there wasn’t anything else he could respond with.

“What do you know, then?” Michael asked. It didn’t sound snappy, it sounded full of concern and a little bit of curiosity. But that was the problem, Calum wasn’t even sure of what he didn’t know.

At that moment, all he was sure of was that he needed his thoughts and feelings straightened out. It also meant he needed to talk to Ashton, whether the latter wanted to or not.

“I know I need to talk to him as soon as possible.”

Calum felt Michael place a hand on his shoulder, patting him softly. “How are you gonna do that?”

He thought for a moment before a thought came to him. Calum sat up straight, finally with a smile on his face. “Let’s use your tendency to become a snoop to good use, shall we?”

“If you say so,” was Michael’s response, trying to make it sound uninterested but Calum was sure Michael was happy to help him.


	12. but i tore down my walls and opened my doors

Getting the night off to focus on something other than his own problems was probably the best thing to happen to Michael in days. Aside from the fact that it was Calum’s problems that he was trying to help with, he was glad to have his mind on something else.

After Michael agreed with Calum's request after he explained that he wanted Michael to repeat what he had done before and look through Maya’s files again, he waited until Calum had drifted off to sleep before he let his thoughts consume him once again.

The night of his and Luke’s date played over and over every time he tried to close his eyes. If he had the choice, he wanted to end the memory before he mentioned his lack of date nights over the past year. It was the moment the whole night shifted and as much as he scolded himself that it was a mistake to even mention, he couldn’t take back what already happened.

To add to his frustration, even with how many times he tried to push the thought away, he can’t erase the fact that he failed to notice how genuine Luke was with him during that night. He was so caught up in his walls that he didn’t pick up the way Luke was treating him.

He groaned as he laid flat on his back, taking several deep breaths. “Idiot,” he muttered to himself, reaching up for his thumb and middle finger to massage his temples. He groaned again as he pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes.

Not once during the date did Luke mention Michael’s job until he mentioned it himself. Even after Michael had opened the topic, Luke still continued to seem uncaring about that little fact about Michael.

Luke had the fucking _decency_ to try and be thorough of his decision on where he wanted to take Michael out and Michael blew all that effort away just because of a stupid comment.

The night that started off great ended in such a disaster he wished it never happened in the first place.

With another groan, he sat up and leaned back against the headboard, his head making a soft thud against the wood.

“Go the fuck to sleep,” he heard Calum mutter as he turned away from Michael, pulling back the part of the blanket that was pulled away from him when Michael sat up.

Michael nodded even though it was dark and Calum’s back was facing him. “I’m trying,” he said. “Brain won’t shut up.”

He heard Calum sigh but made no other form of movement to reply to Michael. He was probably already too exhausted from the previous dilemma they were just dealing with.

Michael wanted to laugh at their situation, about how they’re both turned into lumps of feelings just because of two they met not too long ago. It may sound selfish but he felt thankful they had each other and were almost going through the same thing. He knew he can always rely on Calum being there for him.

It took a while for someone to speak up again. “You said to wait another night for your drama,” Calum started, reaching behind him until he felt a part of Michael’s body. He patted Michael’s thigh lazily then retracted his hand. “Go to sleep and then we’ll deal with your problems next, okay? You can sleep over at mine if you want.”

“Thanks, Cal,” he said, squeezing Calum’s shoulder. He scooted back down the bed and turned so he was facing the other way. His eyes were already drooping before a thought came to him. “Hey, Cal?”

Calum made a sound, something close to a growl and Michael couldn’t help but chuckle. “What?” Calum said through gritted teeth.

“I’m pretty sure it would’ve been easier if we fell for each other instead,” Michael said, soft enough that it barely echoed in the dark room. They’ve joked about it before, how they would be the stereotypical married couple and the cliche that they married their best friend.

He heard a hum come from behind him. “We weren’t built to go for easy,” replied Calum, followed by a soft laugh. “Besides, you aren’t letting me sleep and I hate your guts so we won’t work out, mate,” he joked.

Yeah, he was sure he was lucky to have a friend like Calum.

“Wanker,” Michael grumbled, pulling the blanket towards him for good measure. “Good night.”

*

When they arrived at work the next day, they didn’t think that looking for the employee directory would be harder than they thought it would. They knew that even if Maya had piles of papers on her desk, it was still organized.

Michael had a feeling that there was something off when he didn’t find it where he expected it to be. Though, he pushed away the thought.

“Can’t we look through her computer files? It must be there,” Calum said, taking a seat in Maya’s swivel chair as Michael continued to leaf through the drawers behind the desk. “And it’ll be easier to look for.”

Michael closed the drawer he was currently looking through then opened the next one. “Do you even know Maya?” Michael asked. He was starting to grow tired of coming up empty every time he opened a folder. “That desktop is most likely password protected and her password is probably something only she would actually come up with.”

“It doesn’t hurt to try.”

“Yeah, if we have more than an hour to look for it. Look, I know she already printed it somewhere. I saw it on her desk when I was talking to her last week,” Michael said, pausing on a file but slammed the drawer shut when he realized it wasn’t what he was looking for. He groaned before leaning against the desk. “This is hopeless.”

Calum grunted while spinning on the chair. “The world is against me, Mike,” he said. “Why is it so difficult to find that damn list?”

Michael fake gasped, covering his mouth for added effect. “Oh I don’t know, it’s probably because you’re sat there while I’m doing all the work!” Michael exclaimed, abruptly stopping the chair from spinning any further.

“Alright, alright, I’m gonna help.” Calum raised his hands in surrender, pulling himself closer to the desk and then started to look through the papers in Maya’s desk drawers.

Their search wasn’t going anywhere productive and they knew they were cutting close to getting caught. It was only a matter of time before someone caught them somewhere they shouldn’t be in.

“Just as I suspected.”

_Busted_.

“Michael lost his earring,” Calum defended quickly, standing up from the chair and walking far away from the desk.

All Michael could do was lean his head forward and cover his face with one hand while shaking his head. Just as he was about to groan in annoyance, he caught up with what Maya just said.

“Suspected? You suspected what?” he asked, looking up at their handler with furrowed eyebrows.

She just chuckled while approaching her desk. The sound of her laughter was suspicious and Michael remembered the feeling he got earlier. There was something in the way she walked with a little more jump in her step than usual. She had something up her sleeve and Michael just knew it.

“What are you doing here?” Maya asked, placing a transparent plastic envelope on her desk. It caught Michael’s eyes immediately. For the entire time he’s known Maya, he had never seen her bring anything to and from work.

“What’s that?” Michael replied, opting to also ask a question instead of answering Maya’s. “Is Gene giving you homework now?” he added, reaching out to grab the mysterious envelope. He almost had it before Maya pulled it away.

“What are you doing here?” Maya repeated, raising an eyebrow at Michael as if to challenge him to dodge the question again.

Michael remained silent and just stared back at Maya. Slowly, his lips turned into a grin when he finally realized what she was up to. “It’s in there, isn’t it?” he asked then he looked at Calum, silently telling him to move closer to taunt Maya a little bit more.

He should have known it would be an empty threat since she was already used to his and Calum’s scheming. Still, he kept his ground in hopes that Maya’s demeanor would falter.

Michael already knew the answer the moment Maya grinned. “How could your earring end up in there?” she asked, her tone sickeningly trying to sound innocent.

“Cut the crap, Maya,” Michael said, crossing his arms. “How did you know we’d come looking for it?”

“Believe it or not, you’re pretty predictable.” She stuck her tongue out and in turn, Michael rolled his eyes at such childish behavior. “When I left you two alone last night, I already had myself convinced that you’ll do something ridiculous. Calum was so determined to get an answer I had the feeling you’ll go through great lengths just to get it.”

“What, so you brought the letter home?” Calum asked, pointing at the almost forgotten envelope.

Michael examined the thing from where he stood and it was obvious it contained more than just the letter. “No, Cal,” Michael said, shaking his head at how ridiculous the situation ended up being. “She brought home anything that was related to Ashton.”

“I did not!” Maya defended, pressing a palm against her chest, pretending to be offended.

“I bet my entire collection from tonight that even his resume is in there.”

“Shut up,” she started, opening the envelope to most likely return the files where they originally were. “I didn’t know what you were going to look for so I took it all.”

This elicited loud laughs from Michael and Calum. “Seriously, all I need is his address,” Calum said, taking a deep breath after laughing. “I have no intentions of wanting to know anything other than that.”

“Can’t you just call him?” she asked.

“And give him the chance to hang up on me? No, I wanna go to his house so he’ll have nowhere to run to.”

Maya shook her head and dug through the papers before pulling one out. “You’re very different when you’re determined,” she said, handing the piece of paper to Calum. “He’s somewhere on that list,” she added once Calum started scanning the paper.

“You’re gonna hand it to us? Just like that?” Michael asked, walking over and standing behind Calum to look at the list as well. “Why didn’t you just leave it here in the first place?”

“Eh, wanted you to admit to going through my stuff,” she said with a shrug. Before Michael could say anything, she spoke again, “Yeah, I know what you did.”

Michael quirked a brow. “You’re surprisingly okay about it.”

“We’re friends so I’ll let it slide. Besides, I wasn’t even here when you found that, right?” Maya said, a mischievous glint in her eyes while she started to walk backward and away from her desk.

Calum and Michael nodded at the same time. “Thanks, Maya,” Calum said as he folded the list to pocket it.

“Shh, I wasn’t here,” she repeated before disappearing through the door.

“I can’t believe I put up with the both of you,” said Michael, gently pushing Calum away from him and leading the way back to the backroom’s couch area.

Once they were settled down and were just watching their colleagues arrive one at a time, Calum started laughing.

Michael sent a quizzical look towards Calum’s direction, wondering what was going on with his best friend. “What’s gotten into you?” he asked before throwing the pillow that was beside him.

Calum surprisingly caught the pillow through his laughing fit. “Am I seriously going to do that?” he asked while he shook his head, presumably at himself.

“Do what?”

His laughter subsided before he continued to talk. “Go to Ashton’s house,” he elaborated. “What, am I just gonna drive up there, knock on his door, and ask him what the hell is going on with him?”

Michael scoffed as he narrowed his eyes, not understanding what made Calum suddenly doubt the plan he was sure would work. “That was your plan last night?”

“Yeah, but like, I realized what if he slams the door on my face? Or that he has a dog just waiting there to chase me down?”

“First of all, dogs love you,” Michael said. “Also, I’m pretty sure Ashton won’t do that.”

The roll of Calum’s eyes while he crossed his arms was almost predictable. “Right, I forgot you’re all buddy-buddy with the guy.”

“Just trust me, okay? He won’t do that.”

“Whatever.”

Before the conversation dwindled into silence, Michael suddenly got an idea. He also seemed to startle Calum when he sat up straight all of a sudden. “Do you still have Luke’s calling card?” he asked, aware of the hopeful expression that he had.

It was Calum’s turn to narrow his eyes at Michael. “I don’t know, I’m not sure. I think it’s still in my locker,” he said, looking like he was trying to recall where he placed it.

“Can you go check if it is, then bring it to me?”

Calum huffed but he still stood up to go as Michael asked. He heard a murmur of Calum calling him bossy but decided to pretend he didn’t hear it.

Michael smiled to himself as he waited for Calum. If Calum was going to go after Ashton, then what the hell, he’s going to go after Luke as well. He was almost entirely positive that Luke’s place of work was on the card, seeing that contacting and knowing where to find him was the purpose of the card in the first place.

He just hoped it would work as he thought it would. It was unlikely, sure, but he still had hope.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to rip-off my idea and surprise him with your presence while he’s at work,” was what Calum said when he returned to where Michael was. Michael grinned at him as he took the card from Calum to examine it. His grin just grew wider when he found what he was looking for.

“It isn’t like you’re the first one to think about doing that,” Michael said, entering the company name into his phone to locate where it actually is in town. “Although, thank you, I guess, for putting the idea in my head.”

Calum threw the pillow back at Michael. “Sure, sure, but I expect to be the best man at your wedding.”

“I was thinking of asking Ashton to be my best man, actually,” he teased, already expecting Calum to flip him off.

“Asshole.”

*

Since he was feeling a little bit better that night compared to the night before, Michael postponed sleeping over at Calum’s and spent the night preparing himself for whatever outcome that might happen the next day.

It was practically a surprise to him that he fell asleep quickly, despite feeling a mixture of nervousness and a little bit excitement.

The first thing he did after waking up was to check his phone once more to make sure he got the place right and he knew how to get to where Luke was working. He studied all possible routes to get to the building, trying to figure out which one would lead him there quicker, considering all other factors.

When he got to his car, he instantly remembered the last time he drove to meet Luke and knowing that at that time, Luke was thrilled to see him. The realization that Luke might not be too pleased with seeing him again left him feeling disheartened as he backed away from his driveway.

For every turn he took, the more that he wanted to turn back and forget about what he had planned on doing. The nearer he got to where Luke hopefully was, the more his worries grew.

When he was sure he wanted to back out and leave, it was the same time his phone alerted him that he had arrived at his destination. With a sigh, he accepted the fact that it was too late to back down. He also knew he had to do it or else he would live the rest of his life regretting that he didn’t take the risk.

He took his time looking around for a parking space, knowing that he was stalling when he kept ignoring the available ones in hopes that a space closer to the entrance would become unoccupied soon. After a few minutes of going through the parking lot, he finally found a spot that he felt would be good enough.

“You wouldn’t have to be doing this if you just kept your mouth shut,” he told himself when he shut the engine off. “Why do you not know when to keep quiet?” he added, leaning his head against the steering wheel.

He gathered himself for a few seconds before leaning back and unfastening his seatbelt. “Alright, you can fucking do this,” he said, psyching himself up before taking a deep breath and climbing out of his car.

While he was walking towards the entrance, he could already feel his hands clamming up from nervousness. He wiped one of his hands against his pant leg before opening the door and being greeted by someone seated at the front desk.

“Good morning!” the person, who Michael assumed was a receptionist, said while smiling at him. “How can I help you?”

The cheery vibe the man exuded threw him off guard. Michael gulped as he walked closer to the receptionist. “I was wondering if, uhh, Luke Hemmings came to work today?” he asked, cursing himself for how he sounded. “And if it was possible to see him?” he added.

The man - Jappy, according to his nameplate - was already typing something into his computer, searching for something, before looking back at Michael. “May I know who’s asking?”

“A friend,” he said. Jappy raised an eyebrow at him and he realized that wasn’t sufficient information. “Michael Clifford,” he added but then remembered Luke doesn’t know his last name. “Oh uhh, just say it’s Mike. He’ll know who it is.” Michael certainly hopes Luke does know.

Jappy looked skeptical but still picked up the phone and dialed something. “Yeah, someone’s looking for Luke,” he said to whoever was on the other line. “Michael Clifford, he said. Tell him it’s ‘Mike’, apparently, he’ll understand better if you say that,” he said back after a few seconds. Looking back at Michael, he smiled again. “Just a moment, sir.”

Michael nodded in understanding but as the seconds increased that Michael couldn’t hear any muffled voice from the other end of the call, his nerves started to get the best of him again. He was back to imagining how Luke would react as soon as he was notified that Michael was there.

The side of him that was hopeful and unrealistic was thinking of Luke almost rushing to meet him out front, ready to accept Michael’s apology and for them to make amends. It was impossible to happen and he knew that since he wouldn’t even forgive himself that easily if he was in Luke’s position. The realistic part of him knew that Luke wouldn’t be too eager to see him, probably still mad about the whole situation that went down between them.

He wanted Luke’s actual reaction to at least be right between those two scenarios.

After about a minute or two has passed, Michael was able to pick up a faint voice from the other side again. Studying Jappy’s expression, the response didn’t exactly look like it was in his favor.

Before Jappy could tell him what the other person said, he was quick to say, “I’m not leaving until he talks to me.”

The receptionist gave him a hesitant smile before he put the phone down. “Luke is on his way down.”

And _oh_ , Michael wasn’t expecting that. He thought there had to be a lot more convincing involved.

“You can sit while you wait, sir,” Jappy added, pointing to the seating area in the corner of the room. Michael nodded his thanks before trying to get comfortable in one of the chairs.

Just as he was close to feeling comfortable in his seat, Luke got out of one of the elevators. Michael didn’t know what he was anticipating but he should’ve known Luke would be looking furious at him. He almost cowered in his seat if Luke didn’t go straight outside, but not before giving him a look that said to follow him. Of course, Michael knew he should follow because it was better for Luke to get mad at him in the almost empty parking lot than the office lobby.

Luke was already looking at him with daggers in his eyes while his arms were crossed when Michael got through the doors. “Luke, I--”

“What are you doing here?” Luke asked, cutting whatever Michael was about to say. The older of the two was about to answer the question when he was cut off once again. “No, don’t answer that, I don’t care.”

“I just wanna say I’m sorry,” Michael finally got out before Luke was able to stop him.

Luke scoffed, taking a step back. “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before,” he said, annoyance evident in his tone. “Do you not understand what ‘last chance’ means?”

“I do but just let me explain, please,” he said and he wasn’t above begging. If he needed to, he knew he’ll plead for Luke to listen to him even if Luke wouldn’t forgive him in the end.

“I just don’t get it, you know?” Luke started and Michael knew better than to interrupt him. “Why are you even here? It’s obvious that you don’t trust me, so I see no point for you to try to ask for my forgiveness.”

Michael was stunned at what Luke said. He had never told the other man that he wasn’t trustworthy. “I never said I don’t trust you.”

Luke’s laugh was humorless before he shook his head in disbelief. “Okay, let me guess what you wanted to tell me, alright?” Michael was unsure but nodded nonetheless. “You’re scared that I’m one of those people who’ll be ashamed to be seen with you or let alone be associated with you. You think the second the issue of your job arises, I’m gonna up and leave like it’s the easiest thing in the world. You’ve dealt with someone before who couldn’t accept you fully and you’re scared I’m going to be just like them,” Luke said, each sentence was a step closer to where Michael was standing. “Please, feel free to stop me anytime,” he added.

Michael’s breath hitched, the lump in his throat turning difficult to ignore. It was hard to admit but Luke was spot on and he realized he had actually verbalized these issues to the man in front of him. “Stop,” Michael barely managed to say, trying to reach up at Luke to gently push him away.

“You didn’t have to say you don’t trust me, Michael, you’ve shown enough evidence that you don’t.” Luke sighed then he took a couple of steps away from Michael. “And I get it, we all have baggage. Trust me, I understand. It’s just pretty shit that you’ve questioned my sincere interest when I have never expressed to you that I don’t treat you like any other person who has a job. You take your clothes off to earn money, so what? Other people lose their morals just to make a living. Shouldn’t they be the ones who should be more concerned about how people see them? Your job doesn’t define you unless you want it to.

“And since we’re being honest here, I did judge you for a little while. When my brother told me you were ‘smitten’ with me, I was unconvinced because seriously, I was doubtful you would be capable of feeling that for a customer. It was shitty of me to judge you, yes, but gradually that judgment changed because I tried to understand where you were coming from. I’m still trying to understand where you’re coming from but it’s obvious trusting me won’t come anytime soon.

“I’m not going to force you to trust me, Michael, because I know how hard that is. I’ve laid all I have to offer and if that isn’t enough then I have to accept that. Maybe it’s for the best. It’s taking the toll on both of us. We should just stop this nonsense.”

Michael was trying his hardest not to cry. Out of all the possibilities he imagined, he neglected to think there will be a chance that he’ll end up in tears. He closed his eyes tight, preventing any of his tears to tumble down his cheeks.

“It was great meeting you, Michael. One day, I hope you find the person you’d be able to trust again,” Luke said and Michael knew he was about to walk away so he opened his eyes and tried to stop Luke from going anywhere.

“I already have,” he said, surprised that he was able to say it with such volume. Fortunately, it got Luke to stop walking and for the younger man to turn back and face him.

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it,” Luke said, his gaze set on the ground. “You’ve made it clear that you don’t. No one’s gonna benefit if we just pretend.”

“But I realized that I can,” Michael pleaded. “Just, please, listen?” When Luke made no intention of moving anywhere, Michael continued. “Last night, I recognized that I’ve let my fears dictate the way I saw your intentions. It got the best of me when I should’ve focused on how genuine and real you were being. It should have happened earlier but last night, you got through the walls I’ve built up. Now I’m ready to accept the fact that there are people who don’t care, people like you.”

Luke nodded but the smile he gave Michael was small and wavering. “That’s good to hear,” he said and Michael thought he was going to approach him again, maybe give him a hug for reassurance. But that didn’t happen and he almost sobbed on the spot when Luke took more steps closer to the door. “I need to get back to work.”

“Luke, wait, please.”

“I’m sorry,” Luke said before he went through the door to get back inside. Michael didn’t take his eyes off of him while he went through the lobby, hoping that he’d look back at him at least once. Luke didn’t.

As he took a deep breath, his eyes surprisingly stopped watering and he felt lighter despite the outcome of his trip to visit Luke.

There was a new flame of determination that was ignited in Michael. If Luke thought Michael would just give up after what they just talked about, he was completely wrong.

Now, Michael was just more confident that it was safe to trust Luke and if it was his lack of trust that pushed Luke away, he was going to make sure that he changes that.

It was time for him to finally try and be happy again.

It was time for him to appreciate the good things handed to him.

It was time to finally let Luke in.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://thnksfrthmxn.tumblr.com) if you want
> 
>  **Stuff to reblog!**  
> [Picspam + link to fic](http://thnksfrthmxn.tumblr.com/post/142074747816)  
> [Fanart](http://thnksfrthmxn.tumblr.com/post/142074094276) made by [Rosie](http://youresoprettythatithurts.tumblr.com) <3


End file.
